Worse life ever!

    • Worse life ever!

      Ever since I've moved to this country my whole life changed. First of all, I don't talked to my 2nd younger brother any more, and haven't been talking for 3 years. We used to be nice though. People have been forcing me to do talked to him but I can't. I don't know what's wrong with me but I have been verbally abusing him. And I also have controversy circling around me (long story). And when I started schooling here, everyone in school just hate me, literally. I even talked to myself. I have been begging my mom to moved school. I haven't found a friend yet that time, was so absolutely miserable. (It's even sad to talked about it - even, my eyes are teary) I remorse about it. People kept on dissing me for no reason. I don't even dare to asked people for help any more cause whatever it is, people will mock about my problems, embarrassed me. Secondly, I'm so glad I get to moved school. And it gets worse instead! Urgh. I have been abused again. For the first two years in this new school, I'm fine till there's jerks barge into it. I have two schoolmates and they are really juvenile. What's confusing is that I found out that my best-friend is handicapped, she's autism. Then the juvenile kids are force me to dumped her. I don't know what to do cause I have no defender and I need them too. It's really sad. I always ended up in the wrong route whenever I had too choose two route. This is called peer-pressure and I can't solve this peer-pressure for one month. Then after one month things gets twisted. My handicapped friend was being friend with that juvenile kids. Urgh.... I don't know. I just don't know! I really need a therapist badly! I lost tons of friends. I have an issue, my teacher said that my issue is "I listened to everybody and I can't listened to myself". I'm in deep pain. I've been trying to commit suicide thrice. And yesterday was really bad, I have yet to know which is right or wrong, and I didn't know that this is wrong so I quoted what my teacher said and my teacher nearly get fired because of me. This problem happened spontaneously. When I asked the whole school who complain, no one dares to admit and probably afraid to face my consequences. Cause I curse. I lost so many friends. Urgh. I don't even know how it feels to be loved by my own parents when my parents are always busy! Now, what's even disheartening is that I can't take IGCSE and can't continue school, I have to stop school literally (it's really embarrassing to say it) I don't know what to do, honestly. My best friend who I've found save my life then she moved. FUCK IT! I still have to look for jobs and for now, I have to take the jobs that I don't like. Damn!
      P.S I have depression cycle. :S

    • Re: Worse life ever!

      hey
      first of all i feel for you completly

      but there is always someone worse than you seriously and im not just saying that. I know what you are going through is hard and feel free to talk to me anytime i'm going through a hard time myself and im surviving so maybe we could help eachother?

      someone really close to me just died and i didnt even get to say goodbye and worse still they died of the same thing my grandad died of so i know whats coming now i've been throught all the pain and i've seen my family go through it already and its really hard. and now i found out today that other family friend has the exact same thing and its on there brain so the odds of them surviving are low.

      I found out last week that my aunt committed sucide a couple of years ago and i had always been told she has died of cancer so thats been hard aswell. and worse is she was only 23 so my whole family have become so guarded its a tabbo subject.

      Also found out last week that 6 out of 10 people on my dads side of my family have died of cancer and 3 others have had it and my dad is the only one who hasnt

      my uncle gambled away all my grannies money

      and all this has happened in the last week or so.

      but i'm getting through it one step at a time
      sorry

      P.s
      by me telling you this it wasnt me having a go and say that have got it worse than you cos thats not true both are situations are so different

    • Re: Worse life ever!

      You've been through a lot, yes friends are a big deal. Some people may not seem like it to a lot of people, but when we're teens, they are. Friends are the world, and they're very important. But depending on having them can be bad, as you can see. Overall, just try and think about the future. As you get older, people get more mature, you'll be able to make more friends easier because they won't be as juvenile and will be more accepting.

      Perhaps what your teacher said is right. You're listening to others more than yourself, giving into peer pressure. Do you ever listen to yourself? Or other people? Try to listen to yourself more often, what you want, not what others tell you to do. Changing the way you act may change the outcome of the way things are going for you.

      Now, for those bullies, the juveniles. Believe me, you don't need a defender. It would be nice to have one, someone to come to your rescue, but for now the best thing you can do is just ignore them. I know it's hard, the things they say can hurt, but you have to remember your own words. They're "juvenile". What they say is probably immature, and you just need to keep thinking about that. They made you dump your friend? How?

      Now, let's think about what we can do to help you out. First, your parents. They're always busy? I think you need to ask them to make more time for you. It's something you need. Love from your parents is essential. Talk to them about how you're feeling, if they don't, how are they going to know and try to help you? They won't. If you go to your parents and say "I need you" they should respond. They're your parents, and you're their child. Hearing from you that you're in need, should get a reaction from them.

      Are you still in school at the moment? Or could you get in touch with your school if you're not? School counselors are really helpful with these types of things. Not just school issues, but friend issues. If you're having troubles with friends, they're trained to give you solutions for things like this. If you also talk to them about your school situation, they will be able to tell you what to do. Even if you're not in school right now (I wasn't too clear on whether you are or not) you can still get in contact with the school, and your former counselors.

      Use the options you have. Your parents can be very helpful to you if you let them know something is up and that they need to do something. I really think if you talk to them, you can find out what to do as far as where to go with school.

      Another thing, how are these "juveniles" acting toward you? What are they doing/saying to bully you?
      [LEFT][SIZE=2]"Adapt and Overcome"[/SIZE][/LEFT]
      [RIGHT]"Funny how the truth sounds so cliche"[/RIGHT]
      [RIGHT]~Jack Ingram[/RIGHT]
      [CENTER]
      [SIZE=1][/SIZE][/CENTER]

    • Re: Worse life ever!

      You need to talk to people - your parents, teachers, counselors. If you don't tell someone, it won't stop.

      Also when you are at home, how are you feeling then? What do you do at home, how are your relationship with your parents?

      You have moved to England? You mention the IGCSE. Where were you before, if you don't mind me asking? I completely relate to the bullying, I have been through that and it's been awful. I am glad I am no longer in high school!