Wow, hold on!
You really are going to listen to your ex? I mean, he is your ex for a reason, and exes always tell stupid things against you.
Please, don’t do anything stupid. I once to was depressed, but I got out of it. And if I can get out of it, you certainly can!

Yea it just takes time.

i second that.

Life I am sure feels near impossible to deal with right now, but it will get better trust me. I have had some pretty low points in my life where I thought "what's the point", but you have to keep looking on the good things in your life no matter how small they might be. It does not matter if the good point is the weather was nice or someone smiled at you, just do not allow yourself to become a prisoner of your own emotions. As far as relationships lasting, they are difficult for everyone and it takes a lot of trial and even more error to find the right person but when you do find that "certain someone" it will last and be something you can enjoy while it does. Be careful though on who you get into a relationship with and make sure they are in it for the right reasons. Yes you may be at rock bottom right now, but that does mean you should put up with someone who is calling you names, controlling, inconsiderate, and just flat out mean to you. You deserve better whether you see or not. On the same token, don't allow yourself to become trapped in the "I'm not good enough for him so I will just push him away for his own good". Guys are not idiots and if a decent guy wants to go out with you, let him. He can make his own decisions and put simply if he did not want to be with you he wouldn't. Your ex is a pathetic jerk and I would not pay attention to a thing he said that's why he is your ex. Not eating only worsens depression, so if you can convince yourself to eat please do yourself a favor and do so. Try and find something you like to do like drawing,writing, singing, dancing, anything that keeps you mind busy. If there is a local horse stable you could ask them if you could work off lessons or even just brush the horses off or something. I know it sounds silly but trust me it is not, and it could do you a lot of good to be in that kind of setting. I know this is a thousand times easier said than done, but try and look on the little if not even tiny things that went right in your day and not the bad. There is a lot of bad in this life but we can greatly minimize its effect, by looking toward the few good things and not allowing ourselves to get to caught up with trying to fix the bad. If we tried to fix all the bad we would be at it a lifetime because bad things are just part of life, it is up to us as to say how much space we will and won't give it. Keep your head up and know things will get better, just give it time. As lonely as you may feel in your struggle, just remember that you are not alone and there are a lot of people out there going through the same thing or have been through it, and are now living their lives quite normally and nowhere near as depressed as they once were Nothing is achieved through death RainbowSaddness, just a lot of heartbroke people, crying, trying to figure out what went wrong, and blaming themselves because someone they care about has taken their own life. It's not pretty, it causes a lot of heartache and sadness for the ones you left behind, and is in noway, under any circumstance an answer to depression.

If you need to talk to someone I'm always here and you cannot listen to your ex at all because his opinions about you don't matter.