Sex issue :( help!

    • Sex issue :( help!

      I'm a 16 year old girl, and everyone says I'm really mature for my age and some of my friends are olderrrrr (like my best friend is 27) so people guess that I'm not a virgin. ESP as I have a much older boyfriend. Truth is, I'm still a virgin. The thought of having sex kinda grosses me out and I think it's awkward and... Well, silly. Yet everyone thinks it's so amazing to "make love"... I'm like super shy and i juat cant imagine being naked infront of anyone. Its not a self-esteem issue as im happy with my body. Yet, i like the idea of making out/kissing/cuddling and shit. I don't know if this is because I'm simply not ready for sex, or of it's due to the fact that I've been sexually abused for years as I've read that victims usually have issues with sex? I'm scared that there might be something wrong with me... I just want to know what you guys think is wrong or just give me some advice!
      [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]People will hate you, rate you, shake you and break you. How strong you stand is what makes you. ♥
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    • Re: Sex issue :( help!

      Sex isn't all it's hyped up to be and you shouldn't do it just because people say you're more mature for your age. If someone says you must be something, doesn't mean you have to go out and be it. There's nothing wrong with you. I've been sexually abused but I have no problem with sex. I think the fact that you think sex is gross and silly kind of shows that you're still pretty immature and too immature for sex. Just don't have sex until you're ready or until you think it's fine and not gross. I certainly didn't think it was gross when I was a virgin. Also, have sex when you want to, not if someone else wants you too.
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    • Re: Sex issue :( help!

      There is absolutely nothing wrong with you! If you don't want to have sex, then that's fine. Sex isn't for everyone, and you shouldn't feel like you have to have sex if it's not what you want. It's ok to be a virgin. I'm a virgin too, and I'm 17. I'll probably be a virgin for a while. Not only am I not ready for it, but I don't like to rush into things. But I wouldn't worry if I were you. Part of being human is the natural instinct to have sex. You're still young, so maybe it hasn't come for you yet. It may not ever come, but it probably will.

      As for being sexually abused in the past, I'm so sorry that you went through that. I couldn't even to begin to imagine having to go through that and there is no possible way I could ever understand how much hurt that must've caused. I suppose it could be part of the reason why you feel the way you do about sex. The logic makes sense, but I don't know for sure. But just remember like I said before, there is nothing wrong with you.
    • Re: Sex issue :( help!

      Dexter. wrote:

      Anyone that claims that they are really mature for their age is exactly the opposite.


      People say I'm mature, not me.

      ---------- Post added at 09:46 AM ---------- Previous post was at 09:42 AM ----------

      JanayElizabeth wrote:

      There is absolutely nothing wrong with you! If you don't want to have sex, then that's fine. Sex isn't for everyone, and you shouldn't feel like you have to have sex if it's not what you want. It's ok to be a virgin. I'm a virgin too, and I'm 17. I'll probably be a virgin for a while. Not only am I not ready for it, but I don't like to rush into things. But I wouldn't worry if I were you. Part of being human is the natural instinct to have sex. You're still young, so maybe it hasn't come for you yet. It may not ever come, but it probably will.

      As for being sexually abused in the past, I'm so sorry that you went through that. I couldn't even to begin to imagine having to go through that and there is no possible way I could ever understand how much hurt that must've caused. I suppose it could be part of the reason why you feel the way you do about sex. The logic makes sense, but I don't know for sure. But just remember like I said before, there is nothing wrong with you.


      Thank you so much, Janay! Really needed that reassurance. I appreciate you taking time to reply :) x
      [FONT="Comic Sans MS"]People will hate you, rate you, shake you and break you. How strong you stand is what makes you. ♥
      [/FONT]http://www.staystrongyall.blogspot.com
    • Hola .
      I liked what you had to say about your past experience about your life an that you are on top of it .
      If you dont want to have sexual activity just dont you can wait until you meet a nice Male that will love you an unerstand your Paine that you are going through. Haveing older friends it's nice and they can get you started some activity that you think that is great because they are show you an it could be how they started themselves, for me I would be a happy camper if they where the right company, now being shy is normal an it's just you how you are growing up in life terms nothing more ,you can pick the female you want to be, like outspoken and loud rude and obnoxious that's the life that we pick to be. Sex will always be there an you can pick any Male you want an more then him or even cheating on him if you want too
      Now about your sexual abuse I'm sorry, you need to understand how you feel yourself from day to day when you are thinking about sexual activity and o understand how you feel towards the activity yes being kissed is very nice and sweet, , tack your time dont do it because your friends are talking about, yes it's like haveing some hot flashes an it's hard at that. Try to understand how you real feel an if you like to be loved agine in a different feelings this time, SO I HOPE THAT YOU HAVE A GOOD TIME AND UNDERSTAND YOUR FEELINGS TOWARDS LIFE ITS WHAT WE MAKE IT BE NOTHING MORE AN ITS GONNA FAST