whats the longest you’ve gone without masturbation

    • I think on interpretation of script we will have to agree to disagree because people tend to interepret them from their own perspective.

      Ryanschmo wrote:

      ...we just don't crave real sex, consensual or not, the way we used to...
      But, between this, your second point, and the third one, it seems like you want it both ways. On the one hand you argue that we need the sex drive to be unfulfilled by masturbation so it provides the motivation to find a partner, marry and procreate and yet, in claiming masturbation is an addiction rather than a manifestation of the sex drive, you also say that we don't need to respond to our sex drive and can simply ignore it at those points in our life when marriage and procreation would not be sensible. Or are you? Are you claiming we should all marry and start a family as soon as we start to feel horny?

      The idea that procreation is the only allowable outlet for the sex drive is also firmly a religious idea and one that is a problem in the modern world because we we really could do with not continuing to grow the population of the world. So, if some people choose not to marry and have children, far from being a problem, that is a good thing as long as they don't feel driven to that decision by poverty in a failing country.

      Ryanschmo wrote:

      ...It's become a very powerful addiction...
      I don't accept that at all because masturbation does not fit the pattern for what we usually consider to be an addiction.

      You mention alcoholism, lets consider smoking. Let's say John is studying at university and takes a summer job in the kitchen at a restaurant. At the restaurant, just about everyone smokes and so peer pressure makes him do the same. The summer comes to an end and returns to his studies and, at the university, almost no-one smokes so he decides he should give it up. At this point he finds it really hard. The peer pressure that made him start has gone but now his brain has adapted to the nicotine and protests if it is withdrawn.

      So the characteristics of a typical addiction are that:
      1. It is harmful.
      2. The trigger to start it is external to the body.
      3. The inability to give it up is due to the body (including brain) having become accustomed to whatever the substance is.
      Sex and masturbation don't fit any of those.
      1. It is not harmful.
      2. The trigger is internal to the body and is the increase in sex hormones at puberty, i.e. for guys it is testosterone. This is the chemical mechanism behind the sex drive.
      3. The continued drive to do it is also nothing to do with the body having adapted to an external substance but due to the fact that our sex hormone levels remain high.
      Yes, orgasm increases dopamine as do other activities but, while masturbation is indeed very pleasurable, there is more to the drive to do it than that. If an increase in dopamine caused compulsive behaviour we would also see people "addicted" to exercise. Some people do very much enjoy exercise, and take up opportunities to do things but that's hardly surprising - people do things that result in pleasure, but it stops short of compulsion.

      If we want to split those activities that increase our dopamine levels, and which we consequently enjoy, into good and bad we should do so based on whether our pleasure is at the expense of someone else's suffering.

    • Sean2001 wrote:

      I think on interpretation of script we will have to agree to disagree because people tend to interepret them from their own perspective.

      Ryanschmo wrote:

      ...we just don't crave real sex, consensual or not, the way we used to...
      But, between this, your second point, and the third one, it seems like you want it both ways. On the one hand you argue that we need the sex drive to be unfulfilled by masturbation so it provides the motivation to find a partner, marry and procreate and yet, in claiming masturbation is an addiction rather than a manifestation of the sex drive, you also say that we don't need to respond to our sex drive and can simply ignore it at those points in our life when marriage and procreation would not be sensible. Or are you? Are you claiming we should all marry and start a family as soon as we start to feel horny?
      The idea that procreation is the only allowable outlet for the sex drive is also firmly a religious idea and one that is a problem in the modern world because we we really could do with not continuing to grow the population of the world. So, if some people choose not to marry and have children, far from being a problem, that is a good thing as long as they don't feel driven to that decision by poverty in a failing country.

      Ryanschmo wrote:

      ...It's become a very powerful addiction...
      I don't accept that at all because masturbation does not fit the pattern for what we usually consider to be an addiction.
      You mention alcoholism, lets consider smoking. Let's say John is studying at university and takes a summer job in the kitchen at a restaurant. At the restaurant, just about everyone smokes and so peer pressure makes him do the same. The summer comes to an end and returns to his studies and, at the university, almost no-one smokes so he decides he should give it up. At this point he finds it really hard. The peer pressure that made him start has gone but now his brain has adapted to the nicotine and protests if it is withdrawn.

      So the characteristics of a typical addiction are that:
      1. It is harmful.
      2. The trigger to start it is external to the body.
      3. The inability to give it up is due to the body (including brain) having become accustomed to whatever the substance is.
      Sex and masturbation don't fit any of those.
      1. It is not harmful.
      2. The trigger is internal to the body and is the increase in sex hormones at puberty, i.e. for guys it is testosterone. This is the chemical mechanism behind the sex drive.
      3. The continued drive to do it is also nothing to do with the body having adapted to an external substance but due to the fact that our sex hormone levels remain high.
      Yes, orgasm increases dopamine as do other activities but, while masturbation is indeed very pleasurable, there is more to the drive to do it than that. If an increase in dopamine caused compulsive behaviour we would also see people "addicted" to exercise. Some people do very much enjoy exercise, and take up opportunities to do things but that's hardly surprising - people do things that result in pleasure, but it stops short of compulsion.

      If we want to split those activities that increase our dopamine levels, and which we consequently enjoy, into good and bad we should do so based on whether our pleasure is at the expense of someone else's suffering.
      well obviously it can be an addiction, it’s a well known issue people have ruined their lives with

      yes technically in and of themselves sex and masturbating aren’t bad, but they can be an addiction problem if they regularly get in the way of living a normal life

      when your little brother can’t get out of bed in a hurry every day because… that’s normal lol

      If an adult is always late for work/gets fired because they can’t not take care of business before they leave and it takes too long… clearly that’s an addiction

    • Aspen wrote:

      ...

      If an adult is always late for work/gets fired because they can’t not take care of business before they leave and it takes too long… clearly that’s an addiction
      Indeed there does have to be some balance - we need to be doing the other important things in life too and people do need to have a sensible set of priorities.

      But I do also wonder if we have got it right when compulsive masturbation or other sexual behaviour appears to have displaced other important activities. Years ago, it was suggested that masturbation was a sign of mental illness because patients in mental asylums was observed doing it a lot. It turns out the two differences between those patients and the rest of the population were that their mental condition made them less shy about it, and they were bored as, being in an institution, they were cared for. Normal people did it less, but still did it and did so in private.

      So, in cases where people masturbate when they should be doing other things we need to consider the possibility that it is actually a manifestation of depression. One of the symptoms of depression is that people loose interest in things they previously enjoyed and withdraw from much of daily life. Maybe masturbation is simply filling the void, being the one thing they still enjoy.

      But, also, this is not most people. Most guys do feel a urge to cum regularly and, for the first few years, that will be by masturbating but they do it alongside the other activities of life. They go to school, they play sports, they talk to their friends, do homework etc.

    • I am no physician but I found this reference on the MSDS which is the bible for psychiatric diagnosis. Sex Addiction is definitely a thing and excessive masturbation ...

      Diagnoses that could refer to compulsive sexual behavior have been included in the DSM and ICD for years and can now be diagnosed legitimately in the United States using both DSM- 5 and the recently mandated ICD-10 diagnostic coding. Compulsive sexual behavior disorder is being considered for ICD-11

      and

      criteria for sex addiction diagnosis:

      Time consumed by sexual fantasies, urges or behaviors repetitively interferes with other important (non-sexual) goals, activities and obligations. Repetitively engaging in sexual fantasies, urges or behaviors in response to dysphoric mood states (e.g., anxiety, depression, boredom, irritability).

    • collin13 wrote:

      I am no physician but I found this reference on the MSDS which is the bible for psychiatric diagnosis. Sex Addiction is definitely a thing and excessive masturbation ...

      Diagnoses that could refer to compulsive sexual behavior have been included in the DSM and ICD for years and can now be diagnosed legitimately in the United States using both DSM- 5 and the recently mandated ICD-10 diagnostic coding. Compulsive sexual behavior disorder is being considered for ICD-11

      and

      criteria for sex addiction diagnosis:

      Time consumed by sexual fantasies, urges or behaviors repetitively interferes with other important (non-sexual) goals, activities and obligations. Repetitively engaging in sexual fantasies, urges or behaviors in response to dysphoric mood states (e.g., anxiety, depression, boredom, irritability).
      Maybe so but sex addiction is healthier than alcohols or cigarettes addiction :)
      And certainly more pleasurable :D

    • sbpepe wrote:

      dragom24 wrote:

      I did No Nut November last year and it actually got easier to not do it at the end. I will say that i cheated though and did jerk off but just didn't let myself cum. My load on 1 Dec was massive!
      you are an ascetic :lol:
      I really wanted to prove to myself i could do it aaaaand i wanted to see (and taste a bit) that huge load :P ;)

    • dragom24 wrote:

      I did No Nut November last year and it actually got easier to not do it at the end. I will say that i cheated though and did jerk off but just didn't let myself cum. My load on 1 Dec was massive!
      In Canada we have "No Mow" November, where many men don't shave as part of a drive to raise money for prostate cancer research.

      A bunch of countries in Europe and South America have "Festival for the Dead", where they have wild parties in the streets that the spirits of their dead ancestors can come and watch.

      But in the USA they don't masturbate (or pretend to not masturbate). Is it to save on laundry expenses?
      I'm sure that is one event American girls and women are happy to be excluded from.