Confused and Conflicted

Orton Owens · Feb 28th 2023, 1:28pm

omg I am so confused right now. I am a young teen boy who is adopted with conservative parents. My friend an I are at school now. However said friend and I were alone this morning since parents go in to work early. After I showered I undid my towel(I was nude) my friend told me I had a nice penis. He undid his towel and kissed. One thing lead to another and we ended up having anal sex and I am so ashamed.

I don't understand how I could do something so immoral. It's hard enough being multiracial and now have to deal with the fact I did something with another boy.

Megan_Nry · Feb 28th 2023, 3:52pm

From what I read does not appear that you tried to block his advances, looks as if he may have had feelings for you for a while and he took you dropping the towel as a symbol that you might have feeling for him and you did let it go beyond kissing, .might take a while to sort your feeling for him.

Orton Owens · Feb 28th 2023, 4:58pm

Megan_Nry wrote:

From what I read does not appear that you tried to block his advances, looks as if he may have had feelings for you for a while and he took you dropping the towel as a symbol that you might have feeling for him and you did let it go beyond kissing, .might take a while to sort your feeling for him.

you misunderstood. I am ashamed I let him do those things and I am ashamed I enjoyed it. I come from a conservative family, and I just had sexual relationships with a boy. That's why I am confused

collin13 · Feb 28th 2023, 9:09pm

Orton Owens wrote:

Megan_Nry wrote:

From what I read does not appear that you tried to block his advances, looks as if he may have had feelings for you for a while and he took you dropping the towel as a symbol that you might have feeling for him and you did let it go beyond kissing, .might take a while to sort your feeling for him.

you misunderstood. I am ashamed I let him do those things and I am ashamed I enjoyed it. I come from a conservative family, and I just had sexual relationships with a boy. That's why I am confused

I think what you need to work out is why you are confused. Are you confused because you are not gay? This could amount to nothing more than sexual experimentation, but having anal sex is a pretty big step. I wouldn't be ashamed because sex is enjoyable for sure. If you are having thoughts that you are gay, don't freak out about it and give it some time. I'm sure it will all work out in the end.

BJade · Feb 28th 2023, 11:06pm

Don't think of it as immoral, then you won't be confused or conflicted about it :thumbsup:

I know that's an oversimplification, but if you think of it as something enjoyable and natural to do with someone you like (im not sure what or how strong your feelings for the boy is) then its not a problem

being happy and enjoying things shouldn't be upsetting

Gabraham247 · Feb 28th 2023, 11:51pm

Being a teenager or young adult means it's time to start maturing. Part of maturing is deciding for yourself what your personal beliefs are. Don't determine your personal beliefs based on parents, teachers, celebrities, or friends.

jamesfocus · Mar 1st 2023, 3:31pm

Gabraham247 wrote:

Being a teenager or young adult means it's time to start maturing. Part of maturing is deciding for yourself what your personal beliefs are. Don't determine your personal beliefs based on parents, teachers, celebrities, or friends.

that’s part of the human experience. The struggles that we go through make is who we are and there us to be a reason for it.

Pepsifan · Mar 2nd 2023, 3:01am

It's common for teens, even those who are straight, to experiment with others of the same gender and stay straight. It doesn't make you gay, it is just an experience due to hormones.

Rishad · Mar 2nd 2023, 1:49pm

I think it's time for you to come to terms with who you are. You are gay and that's who you are. It was hard for me to. But now I am happy and accepted who and what I am.

jamesfocus · Mar 2nd 2023, 3:20pm

Rishad wrote:

I think it's time for you to come to terms with who you are. You are gay and that's who you are. It was hard for me to. But now I am happy and accepted who and what I am.

My therapist says it’s all about perspective. I think it applies.

pahern0317 · Mar 5th 2023, 12:08am

Lots of people experiment with the same sex. Sounds like you are very young so this shouldn't define you.

La'Mo · Feb 14th 2024, 1:20pm

I use to feel guilty but now I am glad.

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