oy... dilema 14 19

    • oy... dilema 14 19

      i am 19. im talkin to a few different girls. im least attracted to the 23 year old. and the others i am un sure of my level of attraction. i'v been dating an 18 year old for about 6 months or so. im talking also to a 17 year old hwo is a rare chance with. then im also talking to a 14 year old. i chilled with her once. unless yu count the nights we met in summer when she came in to my work at 2 in the mornign with her friends. but that was a while ago. the main thing is, granted there was little sexual tension between us the other night when we chilled, but she had a cold. i think she likes me. and i like her too. now i know the law and therefore will not be planning on doing anything with her. and when i chilled with her, i felt no urge to even do anything. however afterwords i did. so i dont see my self moving anywhere foward with her relationship wise. i kinda felt like a big brother figure when we chilled. like we talked about some isssues shes goin threw. i related to some. one interesting comment she said was "woh yur gonnabe like a inspirational speaker."



      in any case i think ihave decided to chill with her again and see how things feel.


      any advice or comments?
      A sense of being part of the great all-inclusive life prompts us to reflect on our own place and on how we ought to live.

    • Re: oy... dilema 14 19

      I never thought that I would be the one to say this because I've always been the young girl getting mixed up with older guys....but BAD IDEA! 14 and 19 are worlds apart. She's just started high school if not still in the 8th grade...and you're already out?? That age difference won't be so bad when she's like 17 or 18...but now it's just wrong. Keep your eye on those other girls and wait for her to grow up if you really like her.

    • Re: oy... dilema 14 19

      yeah your right. which is kinda what i came up with tuu. to just stay with the other ones. idk. i notice the difference. but i nevr relly went threw normal highschool. but yeah shes cool enough to keep as a friend. i think i;ll be focusing on the toher girls tho.
      A sense of being part of the great all-inclusive life prompts us to reflect on our own place and on how we ought to live.

    • Re: oy... dilema 14 19

      girlfriend? somehwat. thats what everyone seems to call it. but shes been seeing me and her ex boyfriend openly for a lot of the time. which is why we have an open relationship. see we live 5 hours a part. so its like. .. . idk. why try to wear something out that your not even experiencing. like to stay in a monogomus relationship at 5 hours a part and only seeing eachother a few hours every 2 weeks.... its not fair to either of our existences.
      A sense of being part of the great all-inclusive life prompts us to reflect on our own place and on how we ought to live.

    • Re: oy... dilema 14 19

      i say it's a terrible idea to go after a 14 year old, i've been there as a young girl wanting older guys...i didn't know anything then and i'm so glad the guy (who was 20) didn't make a move on me even though he wanted to. she's only 14, she can't possibly know anything about serious relationships. granted, there are some mature 14 year olds out there, but i was one and i can safely say i never would've been mature enough to handle a relationship with a guy 6 years older than me at that time. please reconsider, and only talk to the 17, 18, and 23 year old.

    • Re: oy... dilema 14 19

      Michele wrote:

      mel, did you learn anything while hanging out wiht him? like, do yuo think i should just not hang out with her anymore, or still hang out just not making any moves?


      honestly i don't know what reason you'd have to hang out with her...i can't imagine what topics a 19 year old and 14 year old would discuss. i was friends with that 20 year old and it was a sort of older brother kind of relationship tihng...if you can pull that off and not hit on her, and be sure you can block any moves she makes on you, i guess you two can still hang out.
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    • Re: oy... dilema 14 19

      yeah thats kinda what i feel about it. so you made movess on him? i figured i would be faced with having to block that off.

      i just kinda live life as it comes. shesa part of this generation. if i can play anny part at all in keeping her away from foolish paths. . . idk. as far as what we could discuss, we have different backrounds but similar feelings on experiences. idk i felt a connection the day we met.
      A sense of being part of the great all-inclusive life prompts us to reflect on our own place and on how we ought to live.

    • Re: oy... dilema 14 19

      yeah i made some moves on him, but i was only 14 so it was like...childish moves. like, "hey you're cute *bats eyes*" not real...SEXY moves. of course, i don't know this girl you're talking about, she could be a very developed and sexualized young girl...so she might be more pushy. maybe you need to sit down and tell her that you two can't be anything more than friends because of your ages. if she understands, then she is mature and you two should be safe friends. if she gets pissy, you know she was never a good girl to date anyway.
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    • Re: oy... dilema 14 19

      It doesn't matter what she does, it matters what you do. If she's pushy, then you need to be responsible enough to tell her no. Unless you are mentally handicapped the responsibility is yours to draw the line regardless of her actions. The fact that you even considered her is... you sound like a schmuck. And if you killed everybody who was a schmuck you'd mostly have nuns and monks of one sort or another, it's unfortunate really.
      Against logic there is no armor like ignorance.

    • Re: oy... dilema 14 19

      She's 14 so she's way too young. Don't be a purverbt and date a little girl. Date someone who's adult enough to understand a relationship and understand feelings and sexuality. You like that 23-year-old, so why not hang out with her and see how things go?


      You could be my [SIZE=3]someone,[/SIZE]
      You could be my [SIZE=3]sea...[/SIZE]

    • Re: oy... dilema 14 19

      well yeah i did tell her that. and yes she was understanding and mature about it.


      and i guess it does make me a schmuck to have these internal thoughts and feelings. but maybe i counter that by drawing lines.

      as for the other girls im talking too. of the 4 im talkin to on a steady right now 3 are 5 hours away from me, back in my home town. 1 is this girl who happens to live pretty damn close. eh. idk shes cool peoples. definitly someone who i can learn from and maybe she might learn something from me too.


      she asked me "do yu ever twitch when yu smoke?" and i said yes. i was surprised because people usualy comment on my weirdness from that. and then she said yeah cause most people say something about it cause shes the only one who does that too. to me that something in common says that we can learn from eachother.
      A sense of being part of the great all-inclusive life prompts us to reflect on our own place and on how we ought to live.

    • Re: oy... dilema 14 19

      also i''v been feelin really presured by the girls around my age to have sex. and im not ready for all that. and then i feel some type of way from that girl cause its like "what? you dont want to have sex? what kind of guy are you?"

      then i thought, okay i might be gay. but when i hookd up with 2 different guys there was nothing as well. so its like, idk. im not one for presure. i perfer to just let things flow and if happens it does and if not it doesnt.

      as of now im still a virgin. currently leaning towards a monk-like lifestyle
      A sense of being part of the great all-inclusive life prompts us to reflect on our own place and on how we ought to live.