Well, not entirely sure where to start with this but here goes. A girl and I were seeing each other from about January time until about a month ago. This girl is one of my friends sisters, she's two years younger than me. Everything was great for those 4 months until her friend had a party/film night type thing (nothing situation changing happened there) and we spent the night on the sofa watching DVDs having a laugh cuddling and holding hands (and a week before this, we said we loved each other; the first time I've ever said that to someone). So a couple days after that night her friend who had the party started telling me that the girl didn't like me any more amongst other things and didn't want to speak to me for a week. Two days later the girl talks to me and tells me that everything that was supposedly said wasn't from her, the only thing that was true was that she doesn't want a relationship yet because she got out of a pretty bad long term relationship at the start of the year. So I thought OK, fine she's not ready for a relationship yet, we can continue on with what we had.

The rest is pretty uninteresting but here I am now totally confussed. I've spoken to her about things and she's said that she does like me but wants to be single for a bit. Then I found out recently from her that she's really confussed about her feelings and has feelings for other guys. I know for certain that she does still have feelings for me because of how she is with me; but to be honest I'm not so sure I can deal with the back and forth of "does she like me, doesn't she like me".

I really like this girl, and I really want things to work out...But I'm not sure it will because some of the things she does makes me think there is still the chance of something happening, while other things make me think the opposite.

All her friends who know about "us" have said we look good together and make a good couple and stuff like that. I know we both make each other happy and laugh and cheer each other up when we're down and all that kind of thing.

So onto my questions (sorry about the rant): Do you think I should hold onto the hope of something happening, or should I just leave the confussion etc and move on? And if things were that great how could they just fade like that? I don't know how she could go from being in love with me one minute to liking other guys the next.

Thanks to anyone who reads all of that and helps, I know it's a long story but if reading it confuses you; just think how confussed I am right now.

Ok thanks =] it's just hard because I see how she is with other guys through sites like Bebo and MySpace; it gets to me because I think "Did I do something wrong? Did I not do something I should have done?" that kind of thing...Do you think it's possible that she's liking other guys because she's not ready for a relationship yet and knows that persuing things with me would lead to a relationship but liking other guys won't lead to that?

Yeah I was thinking saying something like that to her would pretty much kill any chance of anything happening, so I don't think I'll be doing that. I've had almost the same thing really, each time I've asked her what's going on with us etc she's always said something like "I don't know, I'm just so confussed about things at the moment". But I did find out she does like other guys as well as me, so perhaps it's just something she's going through to prevent a relationship from happening yet, atleast until she's ready for another one. Any thoughts?

Don't know if this will help you at all DonkieZ but I've been told by quite a few people that something that usually helps is to act like you've moved on, don't make so much of an effort to talk to her, that kind of thing. Then she'll miss the attention (yes it sounds bad but deep down all girls...and guys...love attention from the opposite sex) and once she misses all the attention she'll start thinking about you and how happy all the attention you gave her made her...Possibly leading to her liking you either more or start liking you. It's a shot in the dark but hey.

Wow, I'd totally forgotten about this place. Just got an email thanks to your reply tartsugar, and thanks for the reply. Figured I should update the situation now as it's two years on, so here goes:

It all went down the pan, we barely speak any more now. We're polite and talk every now and then and she's tried to arrange seeing me several times (I'm at university 100 miles from home now so can only see people back home when I'm back there, which is about every 3 months or so) but always bailed at the last minute. For a while that got to me, but then it started to annoy me, and a couple months back I told her, bluntly, if she wants to see me, she can arrange it all because I'm sick of trying to make it work and having her bail on me so many times. Hell one time she had "accidentally" arrange to see two people on the same day, 1 of them was another guy she'd seen the week before, the other was me, who she hadn't seen for about 6 months at the time; she chose him. So that was the last straw, told her to shove it and I was sick of trying.

The only time we've seen each other since the whole incident that started this thread was at her brothers 18th birthday party, where she kept saying I looked really good and even tried to hold my hand a few times. Wtf right? Just a bit. So yeah, I manned up and stopped caring and I'm A LOT happier now. Kinda helps that my course at uni is about 95% female so gives me something to distract me :wink: hehe.

So yeah, thanks for the support guys, I'll definitely be coming back here for advice and to give it