no, i definitely know where your are coming from.
i'm not saying that you are right or wrong.
but just leave it.
these things need to come naturally.

Hmmm, You can't tell someone if they're gay or not,
For 2 Reasons,
1. You don't know for sure. And you don't want to force her into thinking she is a lesbian.
2. You have no rights to tell her, Is she is lesbian, she will realise it one day. it's like someone coming up to you and saying "You're lesbian, Not straight"

EDIT: Didn't read rest of the posts, lol.

""!!""

She clearly becomes physically aroused when she is around attractive women, and not at all when she is around men. VERY aroused- deeper breathing, flushed cheeks, more animated, and on two occasions she became wet. She's asked me a couple times afterwords why she was so "energized." I don't see how there is anything wrong with explaining to her that she is physically attracted to other girls. I think it might help her avoid some awkward or embarrassing situations later on. And its not like i'd say- hey go be a lezbo. I'd just explain what's going on, and she could decide to roll with it or not. Either way, I'd still be her friend

.

You still can't tell if she's lesbian.
It could be a stage, It could be anything.
You're not being helpful and friend-like if you tell her, I hope you realise

she really doesn't understand though. She's been very sheltered her whole life, home schooled and all of that.

Omg, i'm sure she has still heard of lesbianism and homosexuality, She's 17 for gods sake!

"so instead of telling her should I just start talking about a lesbian we both know and let her know i'm cool with it? Cause then I think she might ask what a lesbian is, then I could tell her what they are and let her figure it out?"

Just don't accuse her of being lesbian, Won't help her one bit
You could double check she is aware of lesbians,
but leave her to make her decisions ans find herself.""!""

This thread has probably ended for years or something, I'm just stating an opinion.

Why should you tell her she's gay?

What if she's just boyish?

I don't think it's your place to tell her she's gay. If she's gay she'll come out in her own time.

So this girl is 17 and doesn't know what a lesbian is... Call me a cynic but I find this very hard to believe...