Jennifer, if you ever need anyone to talk to I'm just a PM away.

It does seem like you guys aren't perfect for each other. Although you feel it may work out, he's given you plenty of reasons as to why it won't. Maybe that suggests his lack of motivation to work on the relationship. I'm not doubting his loyalty, because he seems like a gentleman. However, if he can't give you what you want in the long run, as in, your relationship will probably not survive the ups and downs in the future, then you should rethink this. Logically, you guys have different interests, as well as the loss of the romance and sparks.

Allow me to rant here. Who would ever not be with someone like you? You're an intelligent, beautiful woman, I'm sure. This depression you feel is mostly caused by the subdued relationship you share with him, and it'll be gone as soon as you start pursuing someone else. Sometimes, no matter how much you want it to succeed, it just won't. In your case, your indecisiveness is a big hint. Don't feel alone - look around at all of your friends, they're all there for you. Also, it's not like there's nothing to do without him around. You can definitely do better. Pretty soon, another guy will come and snatch you right up.

I would suggest you have a serious in-depth talk with him, regarding just where your relationship is, and where it could possibly lead. If you both want different things, and you're not that compatible...then you shouldn't hesitate to prolong the break-up any further. It just causes more suffering for both of you.

-Hugs.

Look at this positively. In leaving him, you're getting up out of a relationship slump. There are tons of guys out there waiting, and you should give all of them a chance. In the long run, this relationship will not last, so even if you wanted to stay together and you got your wish, you'll split sooner or later. Would you be a happy couple? No. And that's wasting a lot of time.

This is also your chance to go out and socialize a bit more. Personally, I hate having to "let loose" at parties and have fun in the crowd, because I'm more of a few close friends type. You already know it's smart to keep your friends, especially in times like this when they'll support you. Making friends is not a process, it's more of a way in expressing yourself. With whoever you have things in common, just hang out and do whatever comes natural. It's not an overnight process, but slowly you'll get used to it, and start separating those eggs from the basket. You have lots of practice here, making friends. Use the tactics in real life.

Of course a separation hurts. Just avoid the happy couples and focus on yourself. Make a list of things you want done, and how you'll accomplish them. Be resolved and resolute. The new year's coming right up ahead, so this is your chance to start anew. You are independent. Take control of your own happiness!

Firstly, I'm sorry to hear that - I know it isn't easy when things turn bad.


If it makes you feel better then go for it


That makes the two of us.

Not everyone enjoy the same things, that's ok don't worry

That's wonderful that you can say that and beleive it in your heart.

Do you have any idea on the cause of this feeling?


I really think you need to talk to him seriously, because if he's staying with you without wanting to be there you're just gonna' be hurting more in the long-run.

JennyColada wrote:

I just wish that I knew what was going on, with both of us. I feel so lost myself. I really don't want to break up, even though I agree that we aren't totally right for each other. It's just scary, knowing that there's no one else for me right now, and I'm afraid to be alone. But is that really a reason to stay in a relationship? I doubt it. It's a few days before Christmas though, I just want to be happy with him. I want everything to work out, but I'm afraid that we have both already given up.

Things that have lead me to doubt our relationship in the past:
-Our serious lack of a sex life (it was amazing at first, but now I feel like he just has no interest in me sexually).
-Me feeling down. I feel like I'm pushing him away.

I guess that's it. A lot of it is just feelings, but not reasons, so it's a very hard thing for me to understand. I just want to cry, and I want to be held, but I don't have anyone here to hold me.

Thanks for listening.

You really really need to talk to him honey, sounds like you're getting yourself all messed up over this whole situation and it could be fixed easily if you sit down and open up.

Good luck.

Join the singles club. No, it's not pathetic. No, we're not just sitting around waiting for a guy to come by and pick us up. We've got our own goals to fulfil and it's not dependent on a relationship. It'll take some time, but you'll get over this. Cry it all out until there's no more. Then the healing process can start. We're all just a PM away, and we're all rooting for you.