i really don't like my dad.

    • i really don't like my dad.

      i really don't like my dad. he's so annoying all the time and always thinks i'll end up a failure or something. he doesn't support me at all unless he benefits in someway. i don't know how my mom stands him. he's so hypocritical. like if he tells me not to do something, he does the exact same thing. when i say 'i thought u weren't supposed to......' he just says it's a different situation or he'a a grown up or something stupid. he doesn't even really care when i do good. like if he asks me to do get something, when i give it to him, he doesn't even say thank you;he acts like i'm supposed to do it like a servant.

      he's always shouting at me if i don't do something. when he's talking to other poeple other than family, he's always the funny guy and likes to make jokes. but when he's home it's a different story. I CAN'T STAND HIM.

      i wish it was just me, my mom and my sister. i can tolerate my sister and my mom actually cares about me. he might too, but he doesn't act like it. he always says something like 'i don't know how ur gonna grow up'. he is not supportive AT ALL.

      thanks for reading if u did. i just wanted to release my anger in a good way cause i was thinking of breaking his nose or something cause i'm just fed up with it.

    • Re: i really don't like my dad.

      I just read your post and it brought me back to when I was growing up. My Dad wasn't as vocal about his feelings for me but his actions were very clear that he did not support me. He even hit me once because he thought I lied to him. The first thing I want to point out is that parents do the things they do and say for a few reasons.

      One of those reasons is that they were raised the same way. Are the people who raised your father the same way, or were they back when they raised him? There is a good chance that they raised him with that type of verbal negativity. Another reason is that your Dad is doing what he feels is right in preparing you for 'the world'. He may not even mean what he is saying to you, he could just be trying his way of doing 'what's best' for you in his mind.
      Another more common reason is that he is simply projecting his own feelings about himself onto you. This means that when he calls you a 'failure' it is because he himself feels as if he has failed is some way. Can you see how this may be true? The one common thread in all of this is that is has very little to do with you and everything to do with him.

      It makes sense that you would feel how you feel. I would offer these suggestions: talk to him. Tell him how you are feeling when he says these hurtful things to you. Ask him why he is doing that. Just listen to him. Know that he is doing the best that he can in this moment even if it seems as if he is a real jerk. Don;t fight with him even if it seems as if he is attacking you. All of the hurt he is putting on you is the hurt he himself is feeling inside. When you see it from that perspective you allow a space for compassion inside yourself.

      Remember this too: you cannot change another person to be the way that you want them to be. Think about it: If you want him to change you are doing the exact same thing he is doing to you isn't it? The only way to create powerful change is to begin to change things within yourself. In this way nobody will have power over you ever again. Go to this website and get some free info on making this situation better with one of the systems I created. It focuses on verbal praise and appreciation and I feel it could really help you change your situation.
      systemofstrength.com

      Here is another cool site that can help too. It's by a woman named Byron Katie and it's called 'the work'. Really amazing stuff and free too.
      thework.com

      I am new here so I hope this helped in some way. Keep your head up and know that you are not alone.

      Best,.
      Mickey

    • Re: i really don't like my dad.

      he is so impatient. he asked me to fill up buckets with water. i had to go through a screen door, which i'm supposed to lock when i'm done. he passed by and asked why it wasn't locked and i said because i was filling the buckets. the he starts shouting like a maniac saying i should lock it immediately. i tell him i was going to when i finished with the buckets, but he says that's no excuse (still shouting). i am so annoyed by him and his impatience! if i try to talk to him, he'll just answer back something that doesn't make sense. if i reply or challenge it, he just starts to shout again. it's so frustrating trying to talk to him! I really hope he goes to an early grave. i mean it.

    • Re: i really don't like my dad.

      wow! you do sound really angy but calm down don't wish your dad was dead because imagine if he did i know you don't like your dad but sometimes have parents want to make you feel like you can't do nothing so you'll get mad and prove them wrong [hey anytime you feel like this again my name is chat girl i'm new so if you want try to get a hold of me and i will always be here to help if i can