Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

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    • Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

      So I made this thread a long ass time ago, and I would like to get back into dicussing it. Making a new thread because necro-ing year old posts ain't really that cool.

      If you cheated on someone for whatever reasons entirely of your own, do you really have to tell your girlfriend/boyfriend?

      For me, If you did ever cheat, and you don't have any plans of doing it again, I think you should just keep it to yourself and save both you and your partner some drama.

      What do you people think?

    • Re: Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

      I believe it's better to build upon a relationship
      with the base of honesty. If you cheat, you should at
      least let your other know. Sure, there's a chance
      that they won't find out and may save all the
      future arguments... but I think it's better to just
      come clean. There's a possibility of the other in
      finding out from someone else as well. Then again,
      I guess it really depends on what your morals are.

      Personally, I know that if I find out that my other
      was cheating on me, and he came to me and told
      me, I know I would be hurt, but I would've appreciated
      him for just telling me rather than hiding it.

      Meh, that's just me though.
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    • Re: Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

      Honnesty is always the best policy. By telling your gf/bf that you cheated, you do risk the chance of having them break kup with you, but if you dn't tell them and they find out from somewhere else that would make it wayy worst.
      "Don't let what you can't do, stop you from doing what you can do.

    • Re: Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

      I would never cheat on someone, I know how much it hurts inside when someone cheats on you. If i did, Then i would tell my spouse because i beleave the best releationship ceom from honisty and if you dont tell them you maight feel all guilty inside one day or if they find you did what are you going to do then? Lie your way out of it? Not a very good way to go.

      Just imagin if your spouse cheated on you and didnt tell you, You would want to know so you can clear things up.

    • Re: Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

      If my girlfriend cheated on me, and it was like some sort of stupid accident or whatever reason really, and she's not going to to that anymore, I don't want to hear it. Especially if the relationships is going really well.

      Don't spoil that shit and make it worse. You already did a stupid thing, and don't make it even more bad than it already is.

      That's my opinion really.

    • Re: Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

      If you lied to one another once, you can lie again. I think there should be no exceptions for honesty; cheating need not be the end of the relationship. It probably is, but it doesn't need to be. But if I found out that I was lied to, and it's very likely that I would, then the relationship would be over.

      Also, accident made me giggle. "I didn't mean it, really, I fell on his cock!"
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      The post was edited 1 time, last by Corax ().

    • Re: Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

      why cheat?

      if you value the relationship then you wouldn't have any reason to do so.

      Edit:
      BUT, if ever a guy cheats on his girl (or vice versa), i think it would be better to tell than not. why?
      it would make things worse if the girl found out about it from other people. unless, the guy manages to hide it from EVERYONE.
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      The post was edited 1 time, last by ensy ().

    • Re: Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

      hheartstrongg wrote:

      No, I don't think anyone should keep that to themselves. It depends on the person, if you think it would make things worse, then you shouldn't be with the person if you're not able to talk things out.
      If the person doesn't know it, it's a tough thing to say because that person should trust you wholeheartedly, and by you not saying something they're trusting you and trusting your lies. It's just really unfair and really hurtful.
      Plus you should say it before they find out another way and it could potentially make things worse than if you just told them and tried to fix things. :)


      ^Pretty much this if I were awake enough to have said this.

      I'm getting tired of agreeing with you, start being wrong. :p
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    • Re: Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

      Well yeah, it really depends on the scenario.

      If it happened in a fashion that you're almost entirely sure that no one else would find out, then I think you're on the safe side.

      Picture this scenario :

      You fooled around with a person because you got drunk. You didn't mean it, you didnt wanna do it. You were so inebriated and your asshole friends encouraged you to just do whatever. So you ended up fooling around with a complete stranger. Would you really feel compelled to tell your boyfriend/girlfriend that? Don't even tell me the "Oh I won't cheat on anyone, so this doesn't apply to me", because this is a completely hypothetical scenario and you should take it like it actually happened to you. You already feel like shit for doing it. Do you really want to make it worse by actually telling your partner of the thing you did? Nothing, NOTHING, good will come from it. Unless your partner is some crazy amazing, perfect person who would totally understand and not freak out about it, then nothing good will come of telling them. Why not spare the unecessary drama and perhaps a breakup if you completely regret what you did, and you are really certain that it won't happen again?



      I personally have never cheated on anyone, but if something happens that causes me to cheat on the person i'm with, I would really think about it before telling her.

    • Re: Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

      I think I would rather have my partner tell me about their indiscretions, so in the name of fairness, I guess I would eventually come out with it. Although, to be honest, I'm not a great liar, so I don't know if I'd be able to keep it secret anyway. =/
      Love it when you call me Legs
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    • Re: Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

      they don't have to know but it's all about whether you can live with the guilt or not.
      I have cheated on one of my exes...i felt so horrible afterwards but then again he did mis treat me and he never found out . I wouldn't cheat on anyone again i don't think and deffinately not on my current boyfriend.
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    • Re: Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

      If I did try to hide it, my conscience would bug me and I'd simply be storing up drama for the future, because I'd feel that the relationship was no longer a good one, tensions would automatically, even subconsciously increase, and the relationship would probably end from that anyway, probably in a drawn out, bitter fashion.

      I think the issue is a personal one that depends on the individual and the relationship, but I find it hard to think of a relationship which would not ultimately be better from total honesty.
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      The post was edited 1 time, last by Esmo ().

    • Re: Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

      well forst of all i would never cheat on a person who is commited to me in a relationship, but if i ever was to cheat, i would tell my significant other, the chances are it will come out and it will hurt 1000 times more than if you just told her, if the person who you are in a relationship with ends it then at least you can say that you were honest with them.

      basically dont cheat on someone, then you wont have this problem.

    • Re: Cheated on your significant other, do they really have to know?

      panicmayarise wrote:

      Well yeah, it really depends on the scenario.

      If it happened in a fashion that you're almost entirely sure that no one else would find out, then I think you're on the safe side.

      Picture this scenario :

      You fooled around with a person because you got drunk. You didn't mean it, you didnt wanna do it. You were so inebriated and your asshole friends encouraged you to just do whatever. So you ended up fooling around with a complete stranger. Would you really feel compelled to tell your boyfriend/girlfriend that? Don't even tell me the "Oh I won't cheat on anyone, so this doesn't apply to me", because this is a completely hypothetical scenario and you should take it like it actually happened to you. You already feel like shit for doing it. Do you really want to make it worse by actually telling your partner of the thing you did? Nothing, NOTHING, good will come from it. Unless your partner is some crazy amazing, perfect person who would totally understand and not freak out about it, then nothing good will come of telling them. Why not spare the unecessary drama and perhaps a breakup if you completely regret what you did, and you are really certain that it won't happen again?



      I personally have never cheated on anyone, but if something happens that causes me to cheat on the person i'm with, I would really think about it before telling her.


      better to know from you firsthand, than from your friends. at least you have the chance to make the situation look better, you don't know how your friends would say it. it may make you look bad, or not.
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