afraid to date?

    • afraid to date?

      so theres this guy I've known a while and I like him a lot; I asked him out a couple months ago and he seemed sort of excited at first but his final answer was just "I dont know.." so I decided to let it go and pretend like it never happened. Since then we've been hanging out all the time and talk on the phone for hours every day. He's always happy when he gets to see me and his parents always say that he's in love with me and that he wants me to ask him out again...Now a couple weeks ago I guess my bestfriend was talking to him and kept bugging him about why he didn't say yes, his reply was something like "she's taller than me so its awkward." And eventually it came up again in a phone conversation and he says he was just being self-conscious and stupid and that he didn't want to tell my friend the real reason: that he doesn't want to be in a relationship because his past 2 relationships didn't work out (basically they just ignored him and dumped him). He always sounds really sad when he talks about past relationships and sometimes I think he only said "I dont know" because he doesnt want to lose me as a friend?

      sorry that was kinda long and hard to explain, but does anyone have any advice about what I should do?
      [CENTER][SIZE="3"][COLOR="RoyalBlue"]I'd like to make myself believe, that planet earth turns slowly.[/COLOR][/SIZE][SIZE="4"][COLOR="Indigo"]:][/COLOR][/SIZE][/CENTER]

    • Re: afraid to date?

      I think it's understandable, if his last relationships have ended badly, that he would be worried to get involved with you, especially if he is so close to you the way you describe. He will be scared stiff that something goes wrong, and not only does he lose you, but he loses his best friend at the same time. And that is what the whole issue will be.

      I think you need to reassure him about things. Make a plan, a pact, that if you date and it didn't work, there's no chance at all you won't remain good friends, and be best friends. And also, you need to assure him that the past isn't a reflection of the future. And just because something has happened once, or twice, it won't always happen. It hurts, and I can relate to that, but you can't live your life in fear, never taking chances. Sometimes, you have to take a chance.

      I think once you have reassured him, he will be fine. And I hope it works out for you both
      [SIZE=2]Aaron - [/SIZE][SIZE=2]Support Leader[/SIZE] :kiss:
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      Saradactyl;2086538 wrote:


      Haha, Aaron. I wuv youuuu.
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    • Re: afraid to date?

      1. Yea, change your font.
      2. Yea, he needs to grow some nuts.
      3. Yea, he totally needs to move on from the past, no matter how hard it is. Because if you don't move you, you can't expect anything to happen!!!
      4. Basically, tell him that you really feel like you want to give it a try because you think it will work. :) Give him the confidence in it that he needs.