What should I think about this ?

    • What should I think about this ?

      My boyfriend, Chris's, mom seriously hates me with a passion. I have no clue why, Chris has no clue why, his dad, his sister, my parents..No one knows why. It just happened, I guess ? Well anyway, Chris and I broke up a few months ago for about a month, and his mom knew about that. But when we got back together, she didn't know. She saw me around his band practices and after school events and such more often, and asked his dad if we were together again. His dad told her that we were together again, and ever since then, he hasn't even been able to leave the house to go to his best friend's house because his best friend "lives too close" to me. But one day after school, I had a colorgaurd meeting, and I told Chris to ask his mom if he could walk home with me after the meeting and she actually said yes. So after school, I called him, but he didn't answer. I went to the meeting, and after it ended about an hour and a half later, I called twice again..No answer. I called his home phone and his sister told me he was at his ex girlfriend's house watching movies....After he got home, he tried telling me he was only over there for 20 minutes...Which I knew was a lie. Ahhh, what should I think ? I was mad at him for a while, but he got mad at me for being mad at him, and theeeen ! He told his dad's girlfriend and she told me I had no reason to be mad. But Chris's best friend, also went out with Chris's ex, and he was really mad, too. This is so confusing, I'm done noww.
      [SIZE=1]And when the world treats you way too fairly. Well, it's a shame, I'm a dream.[/SIZE]
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    • Re: What should I think about this ?

      As far as him mom hating you, sometimes that happens, not all people like each other...it just happens there is nothing you can do about it. You could try talking to her about it but that might only make things worse...As far as your boyfriend hanging out with his ex that is a hard thing to judge off hand. First off people always assume the worst...that he was cheating on you, which is probably why you got mad (may not be exactly but is in the realm of possibilities). My first thought would be that he probably didn't do anything because of the fact that he got mad at you for getting mad at him...the whole you don't trust me thing. But he might have been stretching the truth a little, in regards to how long he was over there, but that shouldn't be something to worry about too much. I mean he could have actually thought he wasn't over there that long...but I could be wrong.

      I would say talk to him and tell him that you don't really like him hanging out with his ex and see what he says. I wouldn't worry too much about it just now...if things like this continue to happen then you should start to worry but if it is just a one time thing I think you are OK.
      What I should have said was...Nothing!

    • Re: What should I think about this ?

      alfaspider06 wrote:

      As far as him mom hating you, sometimes that happens, not all people like each other...it just happens there is nothing you can do about it. You could try talking to her about it but that might only make things worse...As far as your boyfriend hanging out with his ex that is a hard thing to judge off hand. First off people always assume the worst...that he was cheating on you, which is probably why you got mad (may not be exactly but is in the realm of possibilities). My first thought would be that he probably didn't do anything because of the fact that he got mad at you for getting mad at him...the whole you don't trust me thing. But he might have been stretching the truth a little, in regards to how long he was over there, but that shouldn't be something to worry about too much. I mean he could have actually thought he wasn't over there that long...but I could be wrong.

      I would say talk to him and tell him that you don't really like him hanging out with his ex and see what he says. I wouldn't worry too much about it just now...if things like this continue to happen then you should start to worry but if it is just a one time thing I think you are OK.



      i agree with you 100%
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    • Re: What should I think about this ?

      For some reason, in relationships, quite often the guy's mother has issues with their girlfriends. And I have no idea why. I'm not saying it never happens the other way around, it does, but it does seem more prevelant the other way. It's strange.

      Hard to explain - I guess it could be the old addage that 'nobody is good enough for my son' kind of thing, I don't know. You could talk to her, but generally speaking, her mind is probably made up and you won't break down that wall. You should try and be nice, polite and don't give her any reason to 'hate' you - I am sure she doesn't hate you though. Possibly doesn't approve is more like it, but she may have reasons that are just not true. And by being the best you can be, you're showing her that what she's thinking is wrong. Little things, like if you do go there, take her the odd bunch of flowers, don't have to be expensive. Or if you stay for a meal or a little, help out afterwards to clear up. Just small things, but they will be noticed. Also, make sure you do the same with his dad, because he would be your best ally in all of this. I am sure, if she says something about you - and he knows you're quite a nice girl, and her comments are unjust - he would say it. I wouldn't worry too much though, it's not important, it's your boyfriend and you that matter more, not her.

      As for his actions that evening, well, I can understand why you'd be upset. You had agreed something, and he let you down. And that hurts, especially as she'd been making it so hard for you to meet up as she had been.

      It's a tricky situation, as if you try and say you don't like him seeing his ex, he may think you're quite controlling or jealous. And you're not. You just felt upset that he let you down, and didn't bother telling you. It wouldn't have taken much to text you or call you quickly and let you know he wasn't going to be able to make it.

      I think you need to stress that it's important to communicate, and that in the future, if something comes up, he needs to let you know. It's rude to just ignore you. And why lie to you? You know that he was there longer, so why need to lie? That is the action of someone who's covering something up, so why is he doing that? Is it just because she was his ex, and he knew you wouldn't like it, or anything else?

      I think you should let it drop, and just see how things go. You don't want to be used, or lied to, and I hope that is just a one off, that won't happen again. You both need to be able to communicate, and respect each other, or this just won't work out.


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      Saradactyl;2086538 wrote:


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