HowTo? Forgetting about your past?

    • HowTo? Forgetting about your past?

      So how do you do this... I have had such a shit school career. I had at most one time, a friend. And he wasn't even a good enough friend to go to the birthday party of. My school was very bully aware. The one time my parents found out about a physical confrontation I had, the told the school and the boy in question was punished quite severely.
      But that doesn't change the fact I never went to a birthday party, I was the brunt of a lot of jokes, a lot of scorn. I was a social archetype at my school of what not to be. I didn't try and attract attention I just sucked at being social. I had week long periods at the start of each year where I tried my hardest to fit in again. The first time I slipped up people forgot about me.

      All the 12 years of that lif behind me. How do I forget about it? I'm about to start College and I don't want this lingering in my mind. Are drugs the best option? I will be going to College with the same people. So making amends is not high on my list of expectations from my peers.

      What else is there? I seriously want to forget, I don't want to make my past seem acceptable, I want to just simply not think of it ever again. Is that achievable somehow.

    • Re: HowTo? Forgetting about your past?

      BoiSergei wrote:

      So how do you do this... I have had such a shit school career. I had at most one time, a friend. And he wasn't even a good enough friend to go to the birthday party of. My school was very bully aware. The one time my parents found out about a physical confrontation I had, the told the school and the boy in question was punished quite severely.
      But that doesn't change the fact I never went to a birthday party, I was the brunt of a lot of jokes, a lot of scorn. I was a social archetype at my school of what not to be. I didn't try and attract attention I just sucked at being social. I had week long periods at the start of each year where I tried my hardest to fit in again. The first time I slipped up people forgot about me.

      All the 12 years of that lif behind me. How do I forget about it? I'm about to start College and I don't want this lingering in my mind. Are drugs the best option? I will be going to College with the same people. So making amends is not high on my list of expectations from my peers.

      What else is there? I seriously want to forget, I don't want to make my past seem acceptable, I want to just simply not think of it ever again. Is that achievable somehow.


      How do you forget about your past? It's simple. You don't. And you shouldn't.

      What happened, happened. It'll always be something you lived through, something that has meaning. It'll always be somewhere in your head, and there will always be something or someone that will trigger you to revisit your past. Wanting to forget about the bad just doesn't happened, and if you do somehow manage to legitimately forget it's not going to last long.

      Now, let's say that, theoretically, you do manage to completely forget about your past. What did you accomplish? Your past is meaningful in the sense it's something you've experienced. While your past may be bad, it's a compilation of hundreds, if not thousands, of mistakes and regret. Who cares about those things though, right? We should all care. Look, we learn from our mistakes. Our past gives us an incredible foundation on which we can live today and tomorrow, and the days after that, to the fullest - without repeating the mistakes that made our past bad. Do you really want to be more vulnerable to repeating the same mistake over and over? While your past may not have been the brightest, there is absolutely not reason why your future can't be blindingly bright.

    • Re: HowTo? Forgetting about your past?

      Hello :)

      You know, believe it or not, I was exactly like you up until two or three years ago. For the majority of my school career I messed up all forms of social opportunities and my life was pretty much run down into the ground - but over the time of just one year, I made a full recovery, changed my whole life around, and became the person I wanted to be. By increasing my social life and capabilities, I also had a lot of positive effects with all other aspects of my life. You don't need to forget about all the things that happened in the past. Just because you're going to college with similar people, that doesn't mean you can't have a fresh start and succeed. This is what I did:

      Firstly, do not, ever, under any circumstances, let your grades and education fall behind, no matter what you do. This is the most important thing, and even if sorting your social life required you to leave behind your education, choose your education, and sort your social aspects later on in life.
      Gain the respect of adults first. These are easier to please through showing skills and moral standards, because most adults are likely to think "oh all teenagers are cheeky, lazy idiots". Gain their respect first, and you'll find that you become more confident around your peers as well as adults.
      Don't rush into things. You're going into college and starting a new life - make the most of this opportunity. Make it clear to everyone that you are going through some form of radical reform, and show them that you are confident in yourself, even if you're not. All teenagers are drawn to those who are secure in themselves - put on an act. You know, my father once said that we can learn everything we need to learn from animals. The red deer, when threatened, makes itself seem bigger and harder by making heavier footsteps. You should make yourself seem more confident than you are as well. You'd be surprised how much it works - it sure worked for me.
      From when I left primary school, I had a plan sorted. Not many other people would do this, because I'm just odd. I knew there would be bullies in high school, so immediately I acted like a hot-headed, almost brutal person. While this temporarily limited my friend-making abilities, it sure as hell got the bullies off my back. Even to this day, now I've shown my true colours as a kind person, no bully dares act against me. Stand up to them. Don't go over the top and get into loads of fights, but stand up to them anyways. Oh - and here's a tip - wit will gain the respect of many. If a person is making fun of you, make them taste their own medicine, but in a carefully chosen way. Don't keep doing it - don't become a bully, but just show them you can give it too.
      Slowly work your way into a particular group of friends. There'll always be a group where you fit in. There's popular, emogothystuffs, geeks, nerds etc - as bad as I feel about making these classifications, I'm sad to say that they do exist in these cliques. Work your way into one. If you can't find one where you fit in, then there's still a place you'll fit in. See, every place - school, college, anything - they all have the group of people who don't fit into the other groups. That's where I found my place :)

      Believe it or not, doing all of this will help you forget about your past as well. You'll look back and laugh at what things were like. You'll be fine if you try this - just keep trying as hard as you can, and if you fail, try again. You'll be surprised how well this can work out.

      Good luck :)

      ~Tenris
      [LEFT][SIZE=4]My mind turns to metal, its gears are turning,[/SIZE][/LEFT]
      [LEFT][SIZE=4]And my sanity withers and dies.[/SIZE][/LEFT]
      [LEFT][SIZE=4]This world all around me, it's bitter and twisted;[/SIZE][/LEFT]
      [LEFT][SIZE=4]Reality, madness or lies?[/SIZE][/LEFT]

    • Re: HowTo? Forgetting about your past?

      you shouldnt try and forget your past, it is the experiences that are good and bad that help us become the person we are today, it helps that if you have made mistakes you wont repeat them, because you are starting in college you will have the opportunity to start fresh, you will meet new people in whatever you are studying, if you are moving out of home you can meet the people you are living with, and neighbours etc, but as tenris said, dont let it overcome you and have your education be punished as a result, i took my eye off my studies this year and failed alot of exams and have to repeat them in order to get into the next year of college!! but you should have no problems in meeting new people, people in college tend to be more open and friendly that what they would have been in school as they are out of their comfort zone! good luck mate!

    • Re: HowTo? Forgetting about your past?

      Neglected wrote:

      "I would rather be hated for something I am than loved for something I am not."


      An example of an absolutely awful quotation.

      ---------- Post added at 12:54 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:47 AM ----------

      BoiSergei wrote:

      So how do you do this... I have had such a shit school career. I had at most one time, a friend. And he wasn't even a good enough friend to go to the birthday party of. My school was very bully aware. The one time my parents found out about a physical confrontation I had, the told the school and the boy in question was punished quite severely.
      But that doesn't change the fact I never went to a birthday party, I was the brunt of a lot of jokes, a lot of scorn. I was a social archetype at my school of what not to be. I didn't try and attract attention I just sucked at being social. I had week long periods at the start of each year where I tried my hardest to fit in again. The first time I slipped up people forgot about me.

      All the 12 years of that lif behind me. How do I forget about it? I'm about to start College and I don't want this lingering in my mind. Are drugs the best option? I will be going to College with the same people. So making amends is not high on my list of expectations from my peers.

      What else is there? I seriously want to forget, I don't want to make my past seem acceptable, I want to just simply not think of it ever again. Is that achievable somehow.



      Drugs are always good, and I suggest marijuana at least in recreation.This is not a doctor's not to cure all your problems, just a dose of perspective as I like to call it :wink:

      It really depends on who you want to be. If you want something you work for it. If you don't want to be the proverbial loser you figure out how not to become him. That's why you shouldn't forget your past; your past is the key to what NOT to do.

      Set gials, my friend. What do you WANT? None of this "who am I" bullshit. No. That's why people get Neglected (I had to). For example:

      1) A want a bangin' girlfriend
      2) I want to get fucked up at parties
      3) I want to be relaxed in my environment

      Them's your goals, now how do you accomplish them? And that's what you gotta figure out, though confidence is the money-maker and there are online guides to provide confidence enhancement. I think it's a pill. Either way it makes your love life much more interesting.

      So that's it. You hated high school? GOOD. Now you know what you gotta fix about yourself. Because I, for one, would rather be loved for who I am than hated for who I am. Who are YOU? :o :o :o :o :o

      ---------- Post added at 12:55 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:54 AM ----------

      BoiSergei wrote:

      So how do you do this... I have had such a shit school career. I had at most one time, a friend. And he wasn't even a good enough friend to go to the birthday party of. My school was very bully aware. The one time my parents found out about a physical confrontation I had, the told the school and the boy in question was punished quite severely.
      But that doesn't change the fact I never went to a birthday party, I was the brunt of a lot of jokes, a lot of scorn. I was a social archetype at my school of what not to be. I didn't try and attract attention I just sucked at being social. I had week long periods at the start of each year where I tried my hardest to fit in again. The first time I slipped up people forgot about me.

      All the 12 years of that lif behind me. How do I forget about it? I'm about to start College and I don't want this lingering in my mind. Are drugs the best option? I will be going to College with the same people. So making amends is not high on my list of expectations from my peers.

      What else is there? I seriously want to forget, I don't want to make my past seem acceptable, I want to just simply not think of it ever again. Is that achievable somehow.



      Drugs are always good, and I suggest marijuana at least in recreation.This is not a doctor's not to cure all your problems, just a dose of perspective as I like to call it :wink:

      It really depends on who you want to be. If you want something you work for it. If you don't want to be the proverbial loser you figure out how not to become him. That's why you shouldn't forget your past; your past is the key to what NOT to do.

      Set goals, my friend. What do you WANT? None of this "who am I" bullshit. No. That's why people get Neglected (I had to :) ). For example:

      1) A want a bangin' girlfriend
      2) I want to get fucked up at parties
      3) I want to be relaxed in my environment

      Them's your goals, now how do you accomplish them? And that's what you gotta figure out, though confidence is the money-maker and there are online guides to provide confidence enhancement. I think it's a pill. Either way it makes your love life much more interesting.

      So that's it. You hated high school? GOOD. Now you know what you gotta fix about yourself. Because I, for one, would rather be loved for who I am than hated for who I am. Who are YOU? :o :o :o :o :o
      The worse of a reputation I receive the more I know I'm helping. :love1:

    • Re: HowTo? Forgetting about your past?

      Drugs are always good, and I suggest marijuana at least in recreation.This is not a doctor's not to cure all your problems, just a dose of perspective as I like to call it :wink:
      A dose of idiocy is more like it yo

      All the 12 years of that lif behind me. How do I forget about it? I'm about to start College and I don't want this lingering in my mind. Are drugs the best option? I will be going to College with the same people. So making amends is not high on my list of expectations from my peers.
      Listen Sergio Leone or whatever your name is.......all you need to do is relax, stay who you are as a person, but be more social this time around. Don't be abrasive about it and make it seem like you're trying too hard to fit in, but just play it cool. Do what Tenris and kopite said, essentially. The thing that makes college great is that you don't have to associate with the same old people, it's a fresh start for everyone.

      If you come to the conclusion that you want to do drugs or smoke marijuana or drink alcohol like many do for fun in college, that's fine. Just don't go in with the idea that it's the primary way to become social, you have to master being social sober over the party scene (you can hop into that and have fun any time you want)

      the party scene isn't going to last as long as you'd like to think, the other, everyday social settings however, should be the main priority.

      The post was edited 1 time, last by Prophet of 50 Cent ().