I have been with my fiancee for almost 2 years. I am a bit more experienced than he was when we got together and weve always had a GREAT sex life...until recently. My sex drve has went down ALOT, and he thinks that because i dont want to have sex as much as we used to, that something is wrong with our relationship (such as im not happy or that he desnt satisfy me anymore) but thats not the case. i just dont feel the urge to make love like we used to. How can i imprve my sex drive w/o him knowing i had to put 'effort' into wanting the sex? Also, I introduced im to Anal sex, which is fine, cause i do enjoy it. Its just a great as vaginal sex to me, but one nite we had an "accident" and it hur tme, so ive veered away formit a bit, and yet he still wants it even though he knows how i feel abot it, and he knows i prefer not to delve into that territory again. I understand its a new concept to him, and he enjoy it (and yes its my fault, lol) but the problem is, he makes me feel like thats the only way i can satisfy him. Ive told him this, but he wont stop trying, and he says that im wrong about me not satisfying him...I'm scared ive, in a way, "created a monster", and that if our sexlife continues on this "plateau" that he will find someone tat will do the things i cant. He loves me, yes i know that....but sex and love sometimes do not go hand in hand. Can anyone PLEASE help me with this?
Relationships & Sex-when things 'slow down'.
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well is there any problems in your relationship? anything stressful? anything to cause this sudden decline?
If he says your satisfying him, believe him, guys usually speak the truth and dont play mindgames[CENTER] [/CENTER] -
It's not good to take things for granted. After some time in relationship it happens. You stop going on dates, stop seducing eachother, stop being sexy, stop feeling like sexy young couple. So, you should work on that probably.
Go on date, real date, movies, dinner, lot of kissing, holding hands, looking in the eyes....
Maybe it's just temporarily (I had similar thing recently).
He knows you become "afraid" of anal but he still wants it? I don't like it. I think he shouldn't insist on it, if he knows how you feel. Did you tell him exactly what happened and how do you feel?
I'm sure you can satisfy him without anal.
Does he satsify you?
You can always try new positions, maybe something similar to anal (for example doggie while having your tight together so your his dick is squized with your tights). -
Kevmo7 wrote:
well is there any problems in your relationship? anything stressful? anything to cause this sudden decline?
If he says your satisfying him, believe him, guys usually speak the truth and dont play mindgames
No, our relationshiphas been fine, i jushaventbeen feeling very sexual lately.
---------- Post added at 12:35 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:28 AM ----------
ivaiva wrote:
It's not good to take things for granted. After some time in relationship it happens. You stop going on dates, stop seducing eachother, stop being sexy, stop feeling like sexy young couple. So, you should work on that probably.
Go on date, real date, movies, dinner, lot of kissing, holding hands, looking in the eyes....
Maybe it's just temporarily (I had similar thing recently).
He knows you become "afraid" of anal but he still wants it? I don't like it. I think he shouldn't insist on it, if he knows how you feel. Did you tell him exactly what happened and how do you feel?
I'm sure you can satisfy him without anal.
Does he satsify you?
You can always try new positions, maybe something similar to anal (for example doggie while having your tight together so your his dick is squized with your tights).
Well, the anal accident, tht has caused me to longer want it, was with him, so he knows why i dont really ant to mess around with it anymore. But we did have a alk about it today, and i just told him ouright, i can get over the nervousness of the actual act, but that once we open that 'can of worms' (so to speak) that he seems to want nthing but, and that makes me feel as if my ussy isnt good enough. And of course, he assured me that isnt the case, onl that he enjoys it, and im theonly person hes evr been able to do that with,so yeah he does want to do it alot, but not because he isnt satisfed with my pussy. i guess it was kinda like a kid with a new toy.
I realy appreciate you guys taking the time to coment tho, and i appreciate the advice.!
i DO think i'll mention the Date night to him... -
people always want what they cant have, or cant have often.
I think he may just want to do it, not because your pussy isnt enough, but because its new and he likes it.
I think there is a more simple answer, is there anything new that he could try with you.
Anal is like his 'treat' like something he really wants, is there anything he could do for you that might be like that, maybe some fantasy or something you really want they he could do?
This would make you much more motivated and horny to have sex if there is something interesting or that you cant get that often and only as a treat every so often
I like the Date night idea, but thats usually when there isnt any lust or passion left in the relationship, which I would still say there is[CENTER] [/CENTER] -
I agree.
But I think he should have more understaing for you after that "accident".
I mean, if one partner have problem with something that is only "fun" for the other, I think the other has to understand and respect that.
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