So my dad said this to me tonight.

    • So my dad said this to me tonight.

      I hadn't cooked dinner for dad in almost 3 weeks because mum would always be home. However, tonight she had gone back to having night shifts so I had to take over the cooking.

      To put it bluntly, I suck at it.

      No matter what I cook my dad, there is ALWAYS something wrong with it. It's either always undercooked or overcooked, too much of something or not enough of the other. Either way, I can never meet his standards when it comes to cooking dinner (mind you, I actually can't remember the last time he cooked dinner for me and mum).

      Anyway, tonight topped it. It was a simple spag bowl and I had cooked it many times before. I pretty much had that down and he never really complained about it. We always have garlic bread with it, and I'd put some garlic in the meat. However, tonight, I had accidentally forgotten to cook the garlic bread. Well, my dad didn't like that one bit and he went off at me, asking me how my head works and how he can't understand me.

      Halfway through a silent dinner, watching TV, he said this to me:

      "You really disappoint me, Elizabeth."

      I felt like I had been punched in the stomach several times by a boxing champion. I literally burst into tears at the table. No one want's to hear that from their parent. But really... all because I didn't cook the garlic bread just this once? He began rambling on about how I can't do anything right and how I wont be a good teacher because I'm so forgetful (I'm currently in uni, studying to be a History teacher).

      He asked why I was crying and I said "How can you say that? That's a horrible thing to say to me!" and he said "Well, today went like this,"

      He told me he asked mum what was for dinner and she said that I was going to make spag bowl, he asked why that again.. so my mum said "because I can't think of anything else she wont fuck up."

      Really, this is all because I can't COOK. I've cooked for my friends and my boyfriend before and they all say my cooking is just fine, even though I threaten them with a knife to give me the honest truth.

      I'm just really upset that my dad said that to me tonight. I honestly wish I was dead right now.
      [CENTER][SIZE=4][SIZE=4]"Everyone is beautiful.
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    • Re: So my dad said this to me tonight.

      I think you're somehow underestimating your cooking ability though, it doesn't stand a chance for you not to be good at cooking! :D

      Come on! It's not such a big deal. These things happen, don't worry at all, just keep living and enjoy it, you're gonna forget it soon ...       :rolleyes:

      By the way, whenever you feel like sad and stuff, feel free to come here and speak your mind, don't bottle up your feelings ... We're all here to help you as your friends ...

      Life is short and time flies, so why don't you wanna enjoy it NOW?

      Break a Leg! :wink:
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    • Re: So my dad said this to me tonight.

      One one hand it wasn't nice at all for him to yell at you when you are trying your best. He probably doesn't understand since he hasn't ever cooked for his family. I think something is underlying this though. I don't know many grown men who yell at their daughters over undercooked food. Why is your dad disappointed with you?
      If you want to figure out why he is acting like this you could sit down and ask him. Try to remain calm and listen to what he has to say. But let him know what you think. Then maybe you could ask him to help you cook so you could become better and know what food he likes to eat. You could learn to cook and you two might have some fun/bonding time.

      Remember when you cook that you shouldn't have to try to meet everyone expectations all the time. But what you can do to make it better and tastier is to pick a couple of easy dinner recipes off the internet and keep the instructions handy for each one. You can practice them and then when you cook again. Viola. You have a dinner. Or maybe ask the family to pick a recipe out of a couple you learned so you can make it. Do that each night you have to cook and that way they are happy and so are you. hope things work out. pm me with any other concerns
      Have any other concerns or just want to talk? Go ahead. Pm me.

    • Re: So my dad said this to me tonight.

      ok your dad needs to take it down a notch. Its actually really hard to be a bad cook. I bet you actually rather good at it. Most people who say they cant cook actually can they just dont know many recipes and tricks because they dont practice. But your father should not be insulting your cooking. In all honestly if i were you the next time he complains about something you made tell him there s food in the kitchen make something. Most likely he wont be able to cook anything and will realize how lucky he is to have a daughter willing to cook for someone so rude. Just when you tell him to cook eat what you made cause if he never cooks it could turn out like my dads cooking and thats scary lol. Dont take to heart what he said. Honestly garlic bread is awesome and all but theres no need for a meltdown over it
      pm me if u ever need to talk about something or just feel like talking to someone or whatever...

    • Re: So my dad said this to me tonight.

      Don't worry about it. You sound like you're fine at cooking, your dad's just a little demanding. If you and your friends think your cooking's fine then that's the end of it. Let your dad complain. If he wants better food he should cook it himself. Remember, there are always things that we aren't the best at but we can make the best of it.
      My parents, mostly my mother is very demanding at how I do things. She always thinks there's one certain way which is the best way and won't settle for less, it really ticks me off when I find the way I do things more comfortable      .

    • Re: So my dad said this to me tonight.

      I don't know what to say to make it better.. but I understand how hurtful it can be. Parents are supposed to help you grow, not make you feel bad about yourself, so when they say things like that it hurts more than if it were to be someone else saying it.
      I remember my mum blaming me for her failed marriages. So I started being just as cruel. I'd tell her to fuck off, that she was a terrible mother and that maybe I wouldn't be such a screw up if I actually had decent parents and finished with 'at least I'm not a whore like you'.
      Now she's sucking up -my- ass.
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    • Re: So my dad said this to me tonight.

      Thanks for all your help guys. I need to understand that he works 12 - 14 hour days (including travel) and when he comes home, he wants things to be just right and in a routine. He hasn't said sorry or anything, but there isn't really any tension between us. I think he's forgotten about it.. so I guess I have to as well.
      [CENTER][SIZE=4][SIZE=4]"Everyone is beautiful.
      Everyone has the right to give and receive love and
      everyone has the right to be accepted and belong. Warts and all."      [/SIZE][SIZE=6]
      [/SIZE][SIZE=5]C[SIZE=3]all me, I [/SIZE][/SIZE][SIZE=5][SIZE=3]might[/SIZE][/SIZE][SIZE=5][SIZE=3]answe[SIZE=6]r[/SIZE][/SIZE]
      [/SIZE]      [/SIZE][/CENTER]

    • Re: So my dad said this to me tonight.

      It sounds to me like he's just an asshole or he has some deep rooted issues that he's taking out on you, and that is unfair. My advice is if he doesn't appreciate the effort, don't cook for him at all. If he confronts you and wants to have a problem, talk to him respectfully on why you don't want to do it. If he can't accept that screw it and spit in his food next time... he'll never know.

    • Re: So my dad said this to me tonight.

      I feel For You.. Even My Dad is Like that..He Always Yell Me And Make me work Like A Dog..BUt I know He loves me ..Just He is not good with emotions..He has sacrificed alot for me..

      May Be Your Dad is Works Very Hard . I Would suggest You to make Him his fav food. Take help From YOur Mother :)
      i WIll Eat you Up Raawr

    • Re: So my dad said this to me tonight.

      Why don't you talk it through with him? I mean, obviously there's something you're doing that's bothering him that makes him make a big deal out of something so small, e.g. your cooking.

      Ask him frankly what his issues are about you, and if you can do anything to resolve that. Or maybe you can go to your mother as well and ask her what your father thinks about you than makes him constantly be disappointed in you. Have faith. All you guys really need is a little heart-to-heart talk with one another. Kind of like therapy.

    • Re: So my dad said this to me tonight.

      aww im sure your a great cook :) i think it was a mean thing to say but if thats the only topic that upsets him about you then i would recomend that you just shake it off unless you could get him to talk to you about it with you but i would imagine that that would be prity hard to do :) let us know how things go im intrested :) good luck :)