I'm calling out for help but my family won't listen

    • I'm calling out for help but my family won't listen

      You've probably seen some of my posts around these forums about not liking college.

      So here I am again with yet another concern and a cry for help.

      I hate college. I want to look at other colleges and possibly transfer and go into a completely different major.

      The problem is, every time I bring up not liking my current school, my parents freak out and yell at me. It has gotten so bad that I feel sick to my stomach every time they say "You're not leaving that school!" I feel trapped.

      I don't want to cut ties with them at all. I always want them to be in my life. But how can I do what I want and make them understand that I know what is best for me?

      Mentally, I am not well here. I am depressed and lonely and my major is not what I expected. I want to keep my options open to other schools because I am just a freshman (18 yrs old)

      But how do I deal with my parents on this issue? I am terribly upset and I feel like I'm locked in a prison here. I don't understand why they can't be calm about it and try to understand me.

      Please give me some advice or tips. And don't say "give the school a chance" because that's no longer an option. The semester is almost over; it's been long enough :cries:
      [COLOR="Purple"][FONT="Fixedsys"]~bullet-proof lonliness~[/FONT][/COLOR]
    • Re: I'm calling out for help but my family won't listen

      I don't think there's a better way in this case. If they love you and really want you to finish your studies, they should let you do what you want.
      Try asking them why is that they're so hard on you about it. Perhaps it's because they think you're trying to quit and nowadays an academic degree is a big deal.
      [5:24 AM] lazyday: i love girls but when they're fresh e.g. 7 yo
    • Re: I'm calling out for help but my family won't listen

      Hi,

      I understand how you feel. When I wanted to switch schools my parents freaked out too. Sit down with your parents over dinner or something and explain to them that you're an adult and you have to do what makes you happy. What's the point in continuing on with a major that you're not happy with? It's better for you to find something that you're interested in, and if that means switching schools then so be it.

      Your parents are probably thinking that you want to jump from school to school and that you don't know what you want to do. That may be so, but you're young. You have plenty of time to figure out what you want to do in life. Express to your parents that you would really appreciate their support with this. Make them understand how important they are and what it means for them to be by your side on this.

      Hope this helps :)

      The post was edited 1 time, last by Miss Scarlet: Misspelling ().

    • Re: I'm calling out for help but my family won't listen

      I feel how you feel. I am truly sorry to hear that you are having a bad time. What i suggest to do is to wright everything down in a diary. My brother was also having mentally not happy and after my tip, he is almost back to normal. He writes everything down in there. Or you talk to other family members such as once, aunt, cousin,... or you talk to someone you truly trust like a friend. Or if you are a musician or composer like me you can pour all your feelings into your music. That always helps me, telling my story through music. I hope my tips help you.
      I wish you all the best and good luck.
    • Re: I'm calling out for help but my family won't listen

      at 18 you are old enough to make your own decisions. your parents aren't being as supportive as they should. i know your parents probably want the best for you and they think that college and that major is the best thing for you, but it's your life, ultimately, it's your choice. i think rebelling against your parents is part of growing up. making your own decisions and learning from your mistakes. follow your dream
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    • Re: I'm calling out for help but my family won't listen

      There are a couple things that you can do in this situation. You can cope with it, deal with it until a situation calms down or settles, or passes, or you can start aggressively pursuing what you want to do. Neither answer is wrong.

      Will things get better over time? Will your dropping grades (if you're having trouble maintaining them) affect your family's decision? Are things getting calmer, rougher, better, or worse? What's going to happen at the end of the semester/term? It might be helpful to consider best case scenario and worst case scenario, should you choose to try and cope with it until you can find a spot that's easier for you to make it out damaging everything the least.

      On the other hand, if you just can't do it anymore, if things are getting worse, then things are inevitable going to get rougher, worse, before they can get any better. Please consider all the consequences of dropping out of college, then think about the relationship aspect of the decision.

      Sometimes the rougher times will make things better between people who care about and care for each other very, very much, and this is especially true of families. If they can't respect what you want in the first place, though there might be a good reason for this, and though that generalization may not apply to every aspect of your relationship with them, then there's obviously a problem there that will continue to drive a wedge between you and them, and always will. Maybe, in the end, it will be for the better. Family is Family. If they love you enough to want what (they think is) best for you, I'm sure that no matter what you do, what you choose, you'll eventually make amends with them should you end up hurting anyone. It may take a long, LONG time, depending on your circumstances, and how hard you try, but I'm confident that you can do it.

      I'd just like to say... College isn't for everyone. As much as schools push us these days to go and get a higher level of education, it's sort of wrong. You shouldn't feel guilty at all for not wanting to deal with it any longer. It's not your fault.
    • Re: I'm calling out for help but my family won't listen

      Well, I understand your feeling right now but the difference is whenever I talk to my parents they never give me any attention and that makes me feel suck X(
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    • Re: I'm calling out for help but my family won't listen

      If you talk to your parents in a mature sincere way telling them that the school you are attending isn't good for you then as parents they should support and understand that. I realize that getting a college degree is something your parents want, as does any parent, but they should be supportive of your decision and if they really do care what's best for you then they should let you transfer regardless. Talk to them about it. Let them know exactly how you're feeling.