so erm what do you actually want? advice, sympathy?

i'm not going to give you sympathy because like you said you know you've been immature and said some horrible things and now regret that, so you should learn from them yourself and face the consequences after all you did bring it on yourself

if you don't like your life you should change your attitude because at the moemnt you seem self-centered rude and to be honest not very nice (from the things you have said you've done) if you already are a changed person then kudos to you, but i still don't understand why you are posting this?