Break up?

    • Hey,
      So I've been dating someone for 3 months now. We've not been together for a long time and things are already getting difficult.
      My last relationship didn't make it easier : my ex was emotionally abusive, and harassed me even after I definitely broke up with me.
      Now, with my current boyfriend, I still feel insecure. At first, everything was fine. He's a kind person and he tries to be understanding. But still, there are things that ended up making me more insecure :

      I have depression, and have a treatment, but I kinda had a relapse. I didn't really tell him about it, just that I wasn't feeling so well. We were supposed to see each other one evening after my classes, but he told me on the very same day he wouldn't come because he was tired. But he actually went to sleep at 2 or 3 am like every other night, and wanted to play with his friends. He told me later he just wanted to spend the evening with his friends, when he calls them every day and we barely text and see each other once a week...
      He barely asks me anything about me. He doesn't do anymore the only thing he used to ask (how did you sleep lol) in the morning. He told me it was because he had work (he can work at night), but still he never asks me anything. I'm almost the one who asks him things about him, because I'm curious about him, as someone who cares about him.. the last time we were together, it happened at least twice, that just when I started to talk about something, he took his phone to look at something. When we're together, we talk mostly about games, because that's what he likes, and I'm into some games too. But still.. I mostly like other things, and I always feel like he isn't interested (even though he pretends the contrary), because he'll give me short replies...

      He told me he was tired because we already argued because of that (I told him I felt like we barely talked and he pretended we talked A LOT, then 2 weeks later told me we talked about a lot of things but overall, not a lot, which doesn't really make sense for me...). And I can understand he's tired because of work, and I'm not upset because of that's I'm upset because despite him saying he's here for me, it doesn't feel like he really is. He doesn't even know what exactly my studies are (he explicitly said that to me), which I feel like is kind of a red flag, because if you don't know, why don't you ask me about it ?

      After our argument, I decided not to say anything, at least by text. I don't want things to be tense, but then again, we had a short conversation yesterday and I was helping him searching for job offers... He thanked me and all, but the rest of the day, didn't ask me anything about me, even though I'm spending my holidays abroad and he didn't even ask, not even once, what I'm doing while staying there. I'm just tired of things being one sided.

      I don't know, I'm kind of lost... Do you think I should break up with him?
    • I used to tell him about my day, ask him about various things : basically trying to have a different conversation than "hey how are you, wyd ?" When I don't do that, I notice he doesn't do anything, all he does is send "stickers" and now that we argued, he doesn't do that anymore. He talks to me normally, but won't try to know anything about me.
      This week I've been the one showing marks of affection the most and I've always been doing it, except when I'm not doing well and need some alone time (which is normal, I guess).
      I'm also very insecure, which maybe has an impact on our relationship, but he always said he didn't mind, but how can I believe me when I also know he literally lied to me (once, he said he had to meet some friends of his parents and for this reason we couldn't meet, but then I saw he was playing games. I asked him what he was doing and he told me he was about to go home but when I went on discord, I saw his status and he was literally playing. I wasn't spying on him, and never told him about this, never made a fuss or anything, but maybe this is why it's hard for me to trust him, especially because it was in the beginning of our relationship.
    • Lazybird wrote:

      I used to tell him about my day, ask him about various things : basically trying to have a different conversation than "hey how are you, wyd ?" When I don't do that, I notice he doesn't do anything, all he does is send "stickers" and now that we argued, he doesn't do that anymore. He talks to me normally, but won't try to know anything about me.
      This week I've been the one showing marks of affection the most and I've always been doing it, except when I'm not doing well and need some alone time (which is normal, I guess).
      I'm also very insecure, which maybe has an impact on our relationship, but he always said he didn't mind, but how can I believe me when I also know he literally lied to me (once, he said he had to meet some friends of his parents and for this reason we couldn't meet, but then I saw he was playing games. I asked him what he was doing and he told me he was about to go home but when I went on discord, I saw his status and he was literally playing. I wasn't spying on him, and never told him about this, never made a fuss or anything, but maybe this is why it's hard for me to trust him, especially because it was in the beginning of our relationship.
      Yeah, sounds like he probably didn't really know what he was getting into and isn't ready for a relationship. I still recommend talking it out before you breakup though