Problem with a friend

    • Problem with a friend

      I met this girl ages ago and i asked if she wanted to be mates, so we exchanged mobile numbers. I didn't want to go out with her just wanted to start making new friends. I later asked if she wanted to meet up and she said she couldn't because her boyfriend was too protective of her. We still kept in touch for a couple of months. She then stopped texting me for about 6 weeks, even if i sent her one she didn't reply, i can take a hint when someone is shrugging me off so i sent her a text saying 'if you don't want to keep in touch i don't have a problem with it' she replied saying 'she did still want to keep in touch'. That was about 4 months ago and now the same thing has happened she hasn't text me in about 5 weeks. I have text her but she doesn't reply. I really don't mind if she doesn't want to keep in touch but if she doesn't reply to me how can i know? She is a bit older than me but i'm sure that doesn't matter. What do you guys think i should do? Should i text her saying is there any point? because i can't just leave things the way they are but i don't want to lose any more dignity than i already have. Suggestions and questions welcome?
    • Re: Problem with a friend

      Usually when someone is in a relationship with someone they'll cut off relations with anyone who they might have feelings for, or have sexual tensions toward. Because just by talking to them, they feel guilty.

      This has happened to me countless times, and I'm sure at one point I've done it. So just ask her if she's still dating what's his face, and if she says she's in a relationship... Well, there's your answer to why she's not talking to you.
    • Re: Problem with a friend

      I know that shes still in a relationship with him but before she stopped texting she told me that he had cheated on her but she had forgiven him. So i want to be there for her if it doesn't work out but how can you be there for someone who seems like they are trying to cut you off.
    • Re: Problem with a friend

      Some girls like to keep guys around as back up plans sometimes. That or she is too nice to say that she isn't interested.

      Maybe you should try talking things out with her first, and if she continues to ignore you be like, "I like you, and I'd like to keep this friendship going. But if you're just going to continuously ignore me for periods at a time, then I don't want to talk to you anymore because a friend wouldn't do that." Sometimes you just have to be harsh, because they'll keep doing it if you're not.
    • Re: Problem with a friend

      OK thanks. It's not really a easy thing to say though because if i'm harsh and she does still want to be friends then i could effect our friendship. I think i might say something like 'i don't mind if you don't want to keep in touch anymore just say because it would make things easier for both of us'.

      If i do continue the way things are. Should i just ask normal questions? If she still doesn't reply how long do you think i should leave it before i ask her the question?
    • Re: Problem with a friend

      I've faced the fact now that she won't text back. I'm obviously not sure why, possilbly because her phone broke or maybe she just wanted to cut me off. I will be going to the same college as her later in the summer. She said she would help me out while she was there before she stopped replying. Should i delete her from my phone and get rid of any hope on meeting up at college or should i just keep her on my phone and hope that it was a phone problem and that she will tell what happened when/if i see her at college?

      I want to move on from this but from the things she said about when we will be at college i'm not sure if i should move on until i am 100% sure what is happening and i won't know probably until July-August time and i could see her then.
    • Re: Problem with a friend

      Delete her number and all, because when you go to the same college you'll see her anyways, and then you can see how she really feels about wanting to be friends, so you could get her number back then. I'd advise you to delete it before it gets stuck in your head. I've made that mistake way too many times, and I'm just getting over it myself.
    • Re: Problem with a friend

      $ air $ what sort of mistakes did you have? Problem is it's already stuck in my head. I can't stop thinking maybe her phone has just broke, so in a way i don't want to think i won't be friends with her. I don't really know what to do because it's already got to that point of what you have said.
    • Re: Problem with a friend

      MOTD wrote:

      $ air $ what sort of mistakes did you have? Problem is it's already stuck in my head. I can't stop thinking maybe her phone has just broke, so in a way i don't want to think i won't be friends with her. I don't really know what to do because it's already got to that point of what you have said.


      I have three of my exes numbers embedded in my mind, and no matter what I do I can't get rid of them.

      Oldest ex: He was like my first real boyfriend, so it's natural to remember his, right? I don't talk to him anymore. He played me.
      Another ex: He's my best friend now, so there's no way that number is going anywhere. However, when I dial it or I see it come up on my screen, I pick up with my tongue bitten tightly between my teeth because I want to say 'Baby, I missed you.'.
      Latest ex: He drilled his number into my head. Then he dumped me. Then he flirted with me when he had another girl. Then he told me I had hurt him and broken his heart and he was crying over me. He was 20. I'm 16. Like fuck he would cry over me.

      There's my mistakes. Another one though, is when I started liking my cousin's mate. We talked for about 15 hours non-stop once, the day and night before Valentine's Day. Then he blocked me on MSN and deleted me from everywhere else, and stopped talking to me. I knew that he didn't want to talk to me anymore because we have one or two mutual friends and he was always talking to them. Up until about a month or two ago I was convinced that he would talk to me eventually, but then I emailed him asking something or other, and he said he'd blocked me. I still haven't deleted him off my MSN list. I'll do it now. Gone. I always thought 'It doesn't matter if we don't talk now, because next year we'll be at the same college, and he'll have to say something to me sometime' but I'm not going to that college anymore, so I guess it's fate, in a way. I think. I don't know what I'm talking about now...

      Oh. Right. Yeah. So, you can't delete her number because you already know it, but what you can do is stop calling or texting her to check if it's working. She might have a new number. She could have lost her phone and not have all the contacts from the old one on the new one. She could be on holiday. She could have got her phone taken off her. The possibilties are endless. Don't stress. When you go to college, you'll see her and you can talk it over then.