how to come out?

    • how to come out?

      so this is gonna take a little bit of explaining.

      i met my boyfriend in a really really weird way. we compared dicks after school. eventually he confessed that he was gay and had a mad crush on me for months, and i had to confess to the same.
      and since then our relationship has been amazing. he's everything that i could possibly want and its obvious that were going to be together for a long time, if not for the rest of our lives.

      The problem is, were both closeted. His friends and mine notice that were always together and we've said that were just close friends. They don't buy it.
      They joked that we should get married, so we responded by changing our facebook relationship status to married. Its been up for a while now, and nobody has really said anything. but as time goes on, were sure that more people will start asking questions.

      my school isnt terribly homophobic, but certain parts of it are. unfortunately, a few of my friends are very homophobic, or rather anti-gay.
      what is a good way to come out without it being excessively awkward. i know of people who change their facebook "interested in" to males, and then just tell people that ask that they are gay. i really wanna avoid some sort of big public thing though, and eventually i guess i should just get the balls to tell my closest friends.
      what do you suggest though? i think that it would make everything so much easier if we could just be sorta public. let me know you thoughts though.

      thanks!

    • Re: how to come out?

      Well, id probably start with a close, accepting friend.
      thats what i did.
      and than, i wouldnt tell many other people before you tell the parentals.
      I just had a sit down with my bestfriend, mother, and my best friends foster mother.
      and just told her.

      its quite difficult, but neccesary in my opinion.
      Coming out is extremely hard.
      But totally worth it in the end.
      You and your boyfriend would be MUCH happier not having to hide anymore.
      =]
      [SIZE=2]For if we are not within ourselves; We are without.
      -Chris Crocker
      [/SIZE]

    • Re: how to come out?

      Well, im pretty much out in school, but not to my family. None of my friends have ever had a problem with it. Even people who arent my friends know and they dont have a problem with it. Even the guys who are always saying everything is "gay" or that they hate gay guys, dont truly have a problem with it. Some occasionally make jokes about it, i laugh, they laugh, its fun and nothing truly offensive.

      Point is, some people who u think may have a problem with it, most likely wont, but different ppl are different. It's def best to start with telling ur closest friends. If you cant do it face to face, do it online or something, but just tell them. If they start acting weird around u, talk to them about it. I make sure i tell my friends "do not treat me any differently and dont try to watch what you say" and they are usually like "Lol wtf i wouldnt treat u any different." Things are very comfortable now, i tell str8 guys when I like them (none have ever truly cared lol, some just shocked), who im dating isnt a secret (unless their closeted), its great. Coming out to ur friends rele isnt as bad as it may seem. If you do come across someone who wants nothing to do with u, then thats just something u both must live with. If they can't accept u for who u are, then you don't need them as a friend. If your friends alrdy suspect something between u two, and joke about it, chances are they dont care, so dont worry.

      After telling your closest friends, tell any other friends or people that u think should know. After that, just don't lie if people ask you. You don't have to go up and straight up tell them, but if they ask, tell them the truth. Thats wat I did. Was a bit awkward at first in some situations, but it all turned out ok.

    • Re: how to come out?

      The bottom line is youll figure out who your real friends are. Your probably gonna lose some but youll make some new ones in the process. I wouldnt go around shouting it to everyone, but like the post above me says...if people ask just tell the truth. Theres no reason to lie or hide it, noone should say anything to you. If they do then they are probably hiding something themselfs. Goodluck man.

    • Re: how to come out?

      I got the perfect oppertunity to come out to my close friends. Two of my friends who'd i'd suspected for a while came out within days of each other. I gagued the reaction of my other friends and came out a day later. It was fantastic finally having it off my chest. A massive weight lifted. Another great thing was that my friends didn't care. And i now share an even closer relationship to my two gay/bi friends. Also like others have said, pretty much the entire school knows and no one really cares.

      It's great. However i have not come out to my parents and family. That is going to be the hardest part. I think it would've been easier to just keep going after telling my friends. I reckon you should consider this.