Well last night my boyfriend returned from a cruise in the Mediterranean sea. Things blew up so bad. I never expected this to be his welcome-home call. I knew something horrible was going to happen to us when he returned, it was just one of those instinctive feelings that I get.
He said things to me for the first time and now I realize our entire relationship was built on lies. On him trying to protect me from his feelings and how he felt. We talked together for like....four hours to straighten things out. He even came over to my house, because I told him I wasn't afraid to break up with him, and he came knowing that doing it face-to-face would be the proper way. He was a wreck, too. He didn't even cry at his grandmother's funeral, but our conversation brought him to tears that made him incoherant many times.
When he came over, he kissed me and I almost fainted the feelings were so intense. I guess it was my body's way of telling me that it's not time to let go yet.
I've given him all the time he needs to think things through. I told him he wasn't to contact me until he had something important to say.
The pain I felt from some of the things he said was the worst pain I have ever felt. At one point, everything snapped and I just went numb and couldn't cry anymore. I was hurt emotionally but in my chest it felt like it was burning a hole before all my pain just shut down. I feel sick to my stomach, and the instant I woke up this morning I faced the harsh reality and I've been gone ever since.
I don't even know what's going on. Breaking up with him would be perfect right now, but something inside me isn't letting me snap and utter the words perched on my lips.
I'm not looking for advice guys...I'm a wreck and need support. Please leave messages here and help me through. I know that I'm the only one that can help myself at this point, but support would be appreciated so much.
He said things to me for the first time and now I realize our entire relationship was built on lies. On him trying to protect me from his feelings and how he felt. We talked together for like....four hours to straighten things out. He even came over to my house, because I told him I wasn't afraid to break up with him, and he came knowing that doing it face-to-face would be the proper way. He was a wreck, too. He didn't even cry at his grandmother's funeral, but our conversation brought him to tears that made him incoherant many times.
When he came over, he kissed me and I almost fainted the feelings were so intense. I guess it was my body's way of telling me that it's not time to let go yet.
I've given him all the time he needs to think things through. I told him he wasn't to contact me until he had something important to say.
The pain I felt from some of the things he said was the worst pain I have ever felt. At one point, everything snapped and I just went numb and couldn't cry anymore. I was hurt emotionally but in my chest it felt like it was burning a hole before all my pain just shut down. I feel sick to my stomach, and the instant I woke up this morning I faced the harsh reality and I've been gone ever since.
I don't even know what's going on. Breaking up with him would be perfect right now, but something inside me isn't letting me snap and utter the words perched on my lips.
I'm not looking for advice guys...I'm a wreck and need support. Please leave messages here and help me through. I know that I'm the only one that can help myself at this point, but support would be appreciated so much.
[CENTER][SIZE=5][SIZE=6]Bismarck [/SIZE]
[SIZE=3][SIZE=2]threw hotdogs [/SIZE]
at the socialists.
[/SIZE][/SIZE]
[/CENTER]
[SIZE=3][SIZE=2]threw hotdogs [/SIZE]
at the socialists.
[/SIZE][/SIZE]
[/CENTER]
I kinda knew something was gonna go on by what you were tellin me. I was hoping it wouldn't be so extreme though 
"
Sorry for making a useless post.:cries: 
