I regret the times ... (not suicide)

    • I regret the times ... (not suicide)

      I regret the times ...

      ... when I had a chance to make a move on you, and didn't ...

      ... when we were in a relationship, and I lied and let things get awkward ...

      ... when I tried to set things straight, and let the opportunity pass ...

      ... when I found out ways to confront you, and never even attempted ...

      ... when we locked eyes, and then walked away from each other ...

      ... but most of all I regret having to put you through those situations brought on by my mistakes, if only I had realized it...

      ________________________________________________________________

      When people tell me that the best way to advance through life is by learning from my mistakes, I thought about school and sports and such. Never did I think it would tie into my personal life, and how one girl could do so much to me; but worse I hate how I know I fucked up, and I know I had chances to change where it was going to end up but I still never did anything as I was afraid of the repercussions. If I could go back and just take advantage of one of those opportunities than maybe, just maybe I would be with her still and not in this stressed out mood I've been in for over a year. It sucks that I know it will never work out especially now that I have waited so long and haven't done anything. I have tried getting over her but there is always something to remind me of her, whether it be something she got me or did for me or a situation we both went through. I don't think I will ever be able to forgive myself for both mine and her misery that I caused. I guess that just makes it another life lesson than.
      ________________________________________________________________

      I always thought that all I had to do was get over her since there are other girls that can be just as close and special out there, but they only remind me of her.
      ________________________________________________________________

      ... when I rushed into a relationship with the one girl close to me who use to talk to me and hang out with me every day, but hasn't said more than a sentence to me in a year, all because of my fucking mistakes ...